Is it my fault that my parents argued all the time and now hate each other?
Anonymous
on
May 31, 2015
...read more
It isn't your fault at all. Your parents have issues between them and they maybe just didn't fit together, and that isn't your fault it didnt work out.
Dealing with family stress?
Takes less than a minute. Keeps 7 Cups free for someone else.
A small contribution goes straight to keeping the community running.
GentleStrength
on
Jun 7, 2015
...read more
No. That in itself is a complete answer. It's not your fault. Relationships are complicated and whatever happens between your parents is between them, and it's not your fault. Always remember that even though they might not love each other anymore, they still love you.
grayWolf19
on
Apr 28, 2015
...read more
No it isnt. We play a big part in our parents life, but that does not make us responsible of them. They are grown ups and thus are the owners of their own decisions and actions. You are your own person and should never feel like you caused someone elses actions.
Anonymous
on
May 14, 2015
...read more
no it is completely not your fault that they argue with each other and hate each other... its their personal thing and you need not to blame yourself
gracefulWaterfall69
on
Apr 7, 2015
...read more
I wouldn't think that you had much to do with the arguing, parents usually argue over other things such as finances, bills, or in worse case scenario, about other people.
Anonymous
on
Jun 29, 2015
...read more
It's never your fault so don't blame yourself. Everyone has arguments so your parents are no different and it's not something you should be afraid about. I hope things get better soon
contentedKitty23
on
Jul 20, 2015
...read more
No, that is absolutely not your fault. Please don't feel guilty about it. You did nothing wrong at all.
readerandwriter
on
Sep 8, 2015
...read more
I'm sure you've heard this before, but it really is true: no. Your parents argued for their own reasons, not because of you.
ErinW
on
Sep 15, 2015
...read more
No. I could not say no enough. There is no situation where the answer is anything but a flat and firm no.
kindMoment44
on
Oct 27, 2015
...read more
No, it is completely down to your parents. If your parents are arguing. it is because they are having disagreements. Don't scape goat yourself. And it would only be natural that you get caught up in these disagreements time to time, because you are an important part of their life. But don't blame yourself for getting caught up in it, because it is not your fault.
bountifulPainting15
on
Nov 9, 2015
...read more
Its never your fault that your parents argue. Marriages and relationships have UPS and downs and sometimes, fights happen. They also may turn away from each other. Dont think its your fault, because its not. I promise.
Anonymous
on
Nov 15, 2015
...read more
Of course not!
Anonymous
on
Jan 25, 2016
...read more
Of course not, you cannot blame yourself for your parents' crumbling relationship. Usually people have problems within themselves and that is the root of hate, not a third party.
caringDog68
on
Feb 2, 2016
...read more
No it is not your fault at all. Parents relationships are often strained by many other pressures, such as work or money- every adult has these issues at some point.
Anonymous
on
Feb 16, 2016
...read more
Definitely not! People, including parents, argue all the time and it has nothing to do with the children. Sometimes, there's just misunderstandings and they don't stop to see how it is affecting everyone around them,
SimplyBeing
on
Jul 12, 2016
...read more
We can never be responsible for how other people feel. We sometimes have trouble controlling our own feelings. We can take responsibility for our actions. My parents fought a lot and I felt I was responsible for a long time and for a lot of reasons. The truth is that it isn't fair of them to fight and use their anger against one another because it hurts you. Love is a natural feeling. We have to work hard to learn to hate and once we do we have to work even harder to learn to stop. How other's feel, even people you care a lot about, isn't your responsibility. Adults are responsible for how they express their feelings. Find a safe person to talk to about your feelings. You don't have to carry their anger yourself. I hope this helps. I wish you peace. ~J
StayPositiveFriend
on
Sep 12, 2016
...read more
This is a common thought in kids who's parents are going through a difficult time. Adults in a long term relationship always have rough patches and kids are unlikely to be the fault of this so don't feel like it's your fault. It's a difficult situation and nobody likes hearing arguments, certainly not from your own parents but again, this is not uncommon and I am sure they will find a way to resolve it so give them some time. It can also help to talk about this with a family member who knows your parents.
Anonymous
on
Oct 4, 2016
...read more
Not at all. Parents argue, bicker, fight, discuss and resolve problems in a number of different ways. Whatever is happening at any given time has nothing to do with you. Even if it is about something you did and they have a disagreement about it, they'll be angry at the outcome of the discussion not about the action the discussion was about. I used to hear my parents argue all the time before the divorce and at the time I had thought the same, I must have done something. Reality was, they were angry at each other and even if my name was mentioned, they were upset with each other and failed to find a compromise or resolution. Some couples don't know "how to fight" in a way that reaches a calm understanding or resolution. Please remember, never your fault, they are angry at the situation.
Anonymous
on
Oct 18, 2016
...read more
No, it is not your fault, sometimes it just happens with couples that they argue and split up after that.
Anonymous
on
Jan 10, 2017
...read more
No, it is absolutely NOT your fault! They both love you, but their arguments are between themselves only. It doesn't matter what they're arguing over, it is purely between them and their opinions clashing. If you're really worried, maybe go speak to both of them (separately or together, whatever you feel more comfortable with) when everyone is calm, and tell them how you feel. That could help with them not arguing when they're around you. Good luck, and remember, you are loved!!!
