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Cookiesauce
218 M Embraced 2
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts11 Forum posts4 Forum upvotes6 Current upvotes6 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2020 Member sinceDecember 13, 2018
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Need help with a not so great friendship.
Relationship Stress / by Cookiesauce
Last post
 January 23rd, 2020
...See more My friend and I use to date back in 2015 for only 3 weeks. There was constant fights and all sorts of things. We met again in 2018 and became close friends. We just constantly fight and I dont know why. He says I hurt him and make him sad, but I have no idea what Im doing... Sometimes I could just be sitting there relaxing from work or something and hed be offended by it. This is an online friendship, so I get if he takes our texts differently than what I type, (as in emotions in the words) but I dont know what to do with his inferiority complex. I can say Im with my family and hell breakdown and tell me how much I like them more than him and how I want him to die and all sorts of things. He says I am the reason for a lot of his sadness and I dont understand how? I am just living my life and doing whatever. There was a time also back in 2018-2019 where I went to walmart to get toothpaste and when I said Im at walmart (cause he always asks what Im doing/where Im at/ect.) he flipped on me and said Guess thats more important than me and I dont know what else to do other than feel guilty and bad... I really want help with this, and I promised him Id look for help on here (since aparenlty Im the issue) but I dont think its that easy. He wont believe that he needs help. He wont get help and refuses any sort of help that this app or professionals have to offer. I do research to try and help also, and he pushes it all away. I just dont know what to do anymore. :(
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I don
Trauma Support / by Cookiesauce
Last post
 March 30th, 2020
...See more Im not sure if I should put a trigger warning on this, but I just need help or advice. Ive been having intrusive thoughts lately about sex. As in, I see random people and my mind makes visions of them sexually assaulting or trying to rape me. I dont know if thats trauma based. I tried talking to a friend about this, but he totally got the wrong idea. He thought I want to be raped for some reason? I am terrified of these thoughts, but they urge me to want to put myself on dating apps and other stuff to basically punish me. I feel that it is trauma based because back when I was 14 I had my first boyfriend. He was extremely gross, always wanting to have sex and touch me and see me naked. He was 13 at the time of all this, but he was way bigger than me. He nearly raped me one day and ever since then Ive been terrified of sex. Ive still never done it. When I was in highschool I thought the only way someone could love or accept me was sexually, so I ruined friendships trying to get with my guy friends and it just made issues. But I dont know what to do for these thoughts. They bother me at work, and they are in my dreams. I dont want to be abused or raped, but my mind is telling me I need to be. Should I talk to a therapist about this? Or is there a way I can do something myself to ease the thoughts away? Im sorry if this was in the wrong area to be posted, I am still new to this app.
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I need some advice?
Relationship Stress / by Cookiesauce
Last post
 January 1st, 2019
...See more Ok so this is kind of a long story but Ill try to keep it short. Ok so my friend and I were fine for a couple of months of remeeting (we were friends 3 years ago and then fell apart and just refound each other in July) and from November to now we have been falling apart again. It feels like anything I say or do makes him upset/mad at me and if I try to defend myself against things that arent true then it just makes him even more mad. Theres certain things I have taken into consideration like what makes him upset and other things, but even when Im all nice and happy he says Im mad and angry. During christmas I was low on money because I just got a job after losing my last one so I was short on money and he was upset at me for not getting a gift on time and says Im lying when I said I only had 9 dollars in the bank until the 27th of December. If I try to explain my money situation hed say Im just fighting him and lying. I want to go back to being best friends again but I dont know how and I really dont want to give up on this. I know he has Bipolar disorder, BPD, and depression that is untreated and stuff, but I feel like there has to be another way I could fix things. He doesnt trust I will fix anything and I honestly just want my friend back. I just dont know what to do to be a better friend to him?
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