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Greensky11
198 M Embraced 1
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts19 Forum posts12 Forum upvotes7 Current upvotes7 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2023 Member sinceAugust 13, 2023
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So Finally after 15 months we had Sexual intimacy but...
General Support / by Greensky11
Last post
 August 24th, 2023
...See more Thankful for this forum and I know others agree. Most aren't aware of my situation but bottomline my GF who Ive known for 40 years and we were at both of our separate weddings 30 + yrs ago but now together thankfully.. We started dating 2 yers ago (full circle) by fate and we love each other. We started off dealing with a long distance relationship and then finally moved in together for the last year. But issues came up and she is moving out to be closer to her mother not doing well and older children. We tried but still love each other. Hard to see the move out. But I'm supportive of her move as we've dealt with this before. This time seems harder. I cried out for 15 months to have sexual contact and she always felt smothered when I brought it up 1x a month. Not cool which cause many issues with us. Finally a break through last night but is it short lived before she leaves. We have plans to make it work and see each other a few times a month like before in the beginning. But my question is how do I approach the next time we have sex after last night(no intercourse but everything else) without seeming too overwhelming. She has always been very independent and if it occurs naturally then great. So I have to tread waters lightly. Please advise.
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Help..Back to Long Distance again after live in and GF concerned about .....
General Support / by Greensky11
Last post
 August 23rd, 2023
...See more So now I'm back to a Long Distance Relationship. We started off in a LDR and made it work( we traveled many times to see each other) to where she moved in for a year. It was going to be our home together as we decorated it & remodeled it ourselves. We’ve known each other for 40 yrs & I was at her wedding & her little daughter was in my wedding 10 yrs later. We love each other & share the same goals, interests etc. So after my original post about lack of affection 15 months with no communication from her we talked & she opened up. Still not sure why it took so long but bottomline every time I brought it up she would feel overwhelmed & not feel like addressing it. That happens with people but 15 months? So it created some serious issues for me for many months which came to a head last weekend at a concert in front of her friends where I snapped for the first time ever & said “ Will you ever talk to me” as she was chatting the whole time with her friends & I felt like I was just some random guy. No acknowledgement of me. I was wrong to say that & have sincerely apologized many many times & to her friends who are still furious with me. One slip up out of 1000+ great things things I’ve done.. I’m on the oust sadly which is affecting my GF & her move out of state . So she says on Monday ,which I kinda knew was coming; that she wants to move out & back to our home state to be closer to her mother of 88 yrs not doing well & older children & friends. I totally understand & love them too. We were living in a beautiful place in the Rockies but we had a real harsh Winter 600” snow & we both grew up by the beach but got burnt dealing with injuries & snow even though she lived in the Rockies on/off 15 yrs & I have even longer but at 60 yrs old sometimes we just don’t want to deal. I get it. We are as fit as any 40 yr old. She wants to continue with our relationship despite the distance again but I’m not sure about it working this time around. Maybe that’s me. But I also said I would live there & keep my home here for maybe the Summer but still be here to ski on/off. I didn’t get the feeling she wanted me to move there right now which is fine but just visit when possible until she is settled and gets in a better mind space. I want to give her her space because she is sorting through a lot now as she said I’m not sure I love myself now to give my true self back. Bottomline my GF has concerns about me coming out to visit her & meeting her other friends despite her saying I would like you to visit. She also wants to come back here . She thinks I will snap again in front of her other friends & is worried. I’ve never snapped before & never said what I said before to anyone. I’m very social & get along with anyone no matter the place. Mellow. How do I overcome her concerns? I don’t want her to hold a few totally different times against me .. Sorry for the long message but wanted to give the facts.. So now back to a Long Distance Relationship. We started off in a LDR and made it work( we traveled many times to see each other) to where she moved in for a year. It was going to be our home together as we decorated it & remodeled it ourselves. We’ve known each other for 40 yrs & I was at her wedding & her little daughter was in my wedding 10 yrs later. We love each other & share the same goals, interests etc. So now after my original post about lack of affection 15 months with no communication from her we talked & she opened up. Still not sure why it took so long but bottomline every time I brought it up she would feel overwhelmed & not feel like addressing it. That happens with people but 15 months? So it created some serious issues for me for many months which came to a head last weekend at a concert in front of her friends where I snapped for the first time ever & said “ Will you ever talk to me” as she was chatting the whole time with her friends & I felt like I was just some random guy. No acknowledgement of me. I was wrong to say that & have sincerely apologized many many times & to her friends who are still furious with me. One slip up out of 1000+ great things things I’ve done.. I’m on the oust sadly which is affecting my GF & her move out of state . So she says on Monday ,which I kinda knew was coming; that she wants to move out & back to our home state to be closer to her mother of 88 yrs not doing well & older children & friends. I totally understand & love them too. We were living in a beautiful place in the Rockies but we had a real harsh Winter 600” snow & we both grew up by the beach but got burnt dealing with injuries & snow even though she lived in the Rockies on/off 15 yrs & I have even longer but at 60 yrs old sometimes we just don’t want to deal. I get it. We are as fit as any 40 yr old. She wants to continue with our relationship despite the distance again but I’m not sure about it working this time around. Maybe that’s me. But I also said I would live there & keep my home here for maybe the Summer but still be here to ski on/off. I didn’t get the feeling she wanted me to move there right now which is fine but just visit when possible until she is settled and gets in a better mind space. I want to give her her space because she is sorting through a lot now as she said I’m not sure I love myself now to give my true self back. Bottomline my GF has concerns about me coming out to visit her & meeting her other friends despite her saying I would like you to visit. She also wants to come back here . She thinks I will snap again in front of her other friends & is worried. I’ve never snapped before & never said what I said before to anyone. I’m very social & get along with anyone no matter the place. Mellow. How do I overcome her concerns? I don’t want her to hold a few totally different times against me .. Sorry for the long message but wanted to give the facts..
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Please help w my relationship & lack of affection 14 months led me to finally snap verbally. Sad
General Support / by Greensky11
Last post
 August 17th, 2023
...See more Hello I'm new here because I need some advice. My GF of 2 years but we've known each other for 40yrs and I was at her wedding and she and ex husband and her daughter(flower girl) were at mine 30 years ago.(long story). We both love each other and live together but she hasn't shown any affection for the last 14 months. No passionate kisses or even holding hands and no sex. It was great before. We both know at our age we are right for each other forever and get along great with all common interests. I used to bring up the issue of no outwardly affection & sexual intimacy 1x a wk for 4 months & she would say we will talk about it but now is not the time.. Then last Fall I backed off & brought it up 1x every 2 wks w/ the same reply. Then this March decided 1x a month w/ still no discussion from her. I've been so frustrated & she knows it & it's not about no sex but just the passionate kisses or even holding hands. The little things mean the world to me. She knows how much we love each other but never wants to communicate. Finally last night at an outdoor concert she had her 4 GF's (who I get along with well until today)w/ us & she spent most of the time talking to them & basically ignored me & I then said "are you ever going to talk to me?" Well that set off a spark which I totally regret. I was so frustrated by all the lack of affection. I left today to give her friends who now hate me and her her space and she is still camping w friends. & seeing more music. We are talking Mon.day. Plz help.
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