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IcecreamAndBrownies
296 M Embraced 2
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts13 Forum posts7 Forum upvotes16 Current upvotes16 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2024 Member sinceApril 14, 2020
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Feeling very low today
35 & Over Community / by IcecreamAndBrownies
Last post
 November 22nd, 2021
...See more Just needed to vent because I don't have anyone I can go to. I'm feeling particularly depressed today. My husband has shown very little effort and support in the last year but there is nothing I can do to change that. The holidays bring me down because I am reminded of how alone I am. Normally work is the best part of my day but today I'm just not feeling it. I'm not looking for any advice today as this isn't really something to advise. I just thought writing my feelings of loneliness would be a better way of trying to get it out of my system. I just want to go home and cry.
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Not doing so well
35 & Over Community / by IcecreamAndBrownies
Last post
 November 9th, 2021
...See more I'm feeling defeated...I've been with my husband 6 years and I have tried everything I can think of to improve our relationship. I did individual counseling through an app because I don't have insurance. I tried marriage counseling but now my husband is using her as his individual therapist so we are without a couple's therapist. We recently started a therapy app and saw some improvement but today went completely left. I feel like no matter what I say or how I say it, he is unwilling to fulfill my needs. I need a partner. I need to feel loved. I need to feel appreciated. I need to feel important. I need to be respected. I get nothing. Whenever I bring any of this to his attention he shuts down, very similar to an unruly child. My previous therapist indirectly told me I should consider leaving him. I don't want to because we have children and this is my 2nd marriage. I often don't feel worthy of love and deserving of being happy. My husband does the bare minimum and makes it seem like my wants are unrealistic. I cry to myself when I'm alone because I don't want others to know what I'm dealing with, especially the children. I didn't mean to be this long-winded. It is just a rare moment I can express where I am.
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Tired of the fighting
Family & Caregivers / by IcecreamAndBrownies
Last post
 October 1st, 2021
...See more My husband and I have not been getting along lately. I feel like I take on a lot and when he's home he does very little. When I mention this to him he doesn't want to listen. When I ask a question he refuses to engage in the conversation. I wanted to see a therapist but he is unwilling. I have no health insurance (he forgot to ensure I was on his insurance) so I cannot go on my own. A few days ago he said he would work on himself but today he blew up on me and I don't understand why. He says I'm trying to control him by wanting him to contribute to the operation of our home. We both work so I feel we both should tackle domestic duties. He either refuses to participate or he will half do something and expect me to praise him for something he should do anyway. He gets loud and disrespectful with me. Today I felt like he was purposely picking a fight. I've been through a divorce with my child's dad and really don't want to go through that again. But at the same time, I don't see how we can continue if he doesn't work on how he communicates with me and contributes to the household. I feel like I have done everything I could to support us as a family. Aside from leaving (which i don't want to do) I'm clueless on how to get him to see i want the best for everyone involved.
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Feeling alone in my marriage
Relationship Stress / by IcecreamAndBrownies
Last post
 January 28th, 2021
...See more I've been with my husband 5 years. I love him and believe he loves me. Both of us work long hours outside of the home. We have been struggling back and forth with each other over basic things we don't agree on. When I ask him to help around the house, he thinks I am riding him. I feel like I am doing everything at home on my own yet I'm expected to contribute financially too. For me the situation is not balanced. When we first started living together he was more helpful than he is now. After we got married he gives all his energy to his job and there is nothing left for the kids and me. He feels like we don't have sex enough. I admit that I don't enjoy him the way I used to because I am tired from having to work 50 hours/week and take on the majority of the housework. He has never been very romantic and it would be nice to have that. When I tell him how I feel or how to get me in a better mood, he is not receptive. I want to be more connected but he doesn't like talking about hard things or hearing the truth when its bad I'm at the point where I feel like I may need to get my emotional needs met elsewhere. It is hard but I have to accept he is 40 and not going to change. Just needed to let things out and I figured this was better than involving family or friends
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