Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
Talk to a licensed therapist Wherever you are, whenever you need support. Get matched
LoveAri
35 M Embraced
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts0 Forum posts7 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 1970 Member sinceAugust 27, 2014
Bio
Recent forum posts
LoveAri profile picture
Give her what you didnt give me
Journals & Diaries / by LoveAri
Last post
 August 29th, 2014
...See more I am so mad at myself. I promised myself I would never fall in love again because I will just get hurt. And now I'm sitting here again crying because you made me believe your lies. But its my fault. I knew this would happen. It always does. I hope she breaks your heart before you break hers. Because I would hate for her to live the way I do. Even though I hate seeing you treat her better than you ever treated me I would hate for her to live the rest of her life in fear if getting hurt and you have the power to do that to someone. I will never forget the pain my heart felt when you put your fist to my face. Or when you told me you loved me and then I seen you with someone else. I will never ever forgive you. Im not angry you left me though. That was probably the best thing you ever did for me. Because it was then I realized how better I am without you. I'm angry that you treat the people closest to you the worst and how selfish you are. I hate you for who you are not what you did. So stop trying to apologise. Never apologize for who you are. If you have to apolagize for who you are then better yourself and treat this girl like the princess you should have treated all the girls you hurt before like. And whatever you do dont ever snort a line whe. You are around her. You will ruin everything.
LoveAri profile picture
This is my prayer
Journals & Diaries / by LoveAri
Last post
 August 27th, 2014
...See more Dear Lord, I pray that with the unconditional love you have for me I find the strength to stand up for what I believe I pray that the next time I'm too scared to say no I will do it anyway. I pray that the next time I'm faced with the choice to abuse drugs and alcohol I will say no. The next time I guy lies to me to get in my pants I will say no. The next time the kid from work asks me if he can borrow money (which we all know is for pot) I will say no. The next time my body wants to purge I will say no. And yes. I need strength to say yes. Yes to love yes to you Lord. Yes to the boy who I know won't hurt me. Yes to opening my heart. I need the strength to love like you. The strength to love with no judgment. Amen. 
LoveAri profile picture
Bulimia is controlling my life.
Eating Disorder Support / by LoveAri
Last post
 August 22nd, 2016
...See more You know that nervous feeling you get where your hands get clammy and your forming little beads of sweat on your hair line? Your thoughts start racing and you want nothing more than to run away from the situation your in? that's how I feel every time I have to eat in public or with a group of people. 
LoveAri profile picture
My thank you letter
Journals & Diaries / by LoveAri
Last post
 August 27th, 2014
...See more This is to the anonymous person who had a sharpie at the bowling ally: I went out with some friends. We went bowling it was so much fun I had a since of belonging with the.  One friend of mine left to the snack bar and came back with a large pizza. I ate two pieces. I started to feel guilt and disgust I felt sick. I walked into the bathroom and I knew that I had every intention in purging the only think I haven't eaten all day. I went into a stall I shut the door and in sharpie written on the wall the most beautiful vandalism I've seen yet. It was written small and smudged. 'Girls! You are beautiful and you must believe that' I then left the stall without purging and I walked out of the restroom feeling beautiful. So thank you. Love,Ari 
LoveAri profile picture
I miss you. Love, Ari
Journals & Diaries / by LoveAri
Last post
 August 27th, 2014
...See more To my mom: My favorite memory of you was when you walked into the bathroom only to find me on my knees with my mascara streaming down my face, my fingers down my throat and the water running to drowned the sound of me purging the last meal I ate. The one you prepared for me. You picked me up off of the cold bathroom tile you pulled me close and hugged me. We both cried. The way it felt to feel secure in your arms made me feel like I was your little girl again, Mom. Crazy how I can surround myself with so many friends and still feel alone but when I'm in the arms of one single woman, the woman who raised me, I dont feel alone. Im sorry I keep dissapointing you and always arguing with you. I love you. I miss you. Love, Ari To my dad: I dont think you know how important you are to me. My friends never had a dad as good as mine. I will always be your little princess. I wish youd pick up th phone and check on me occasionally. I love you daddy and I miss you. Love, Ari To both of my grandpas: With out the two of you things are hard. Watching the dad of my mom and the dad of my dad pass away was hard. Two men who made so much impact on so many people. I feel so blessed to have the two of you in my life at the time I did. But without you im falling apart. Nothing seems right anymore. Everyone is sad and nobody talks about it im scared to death of letting people in because I kno how hard it was to lose you and I dont want to feel that heart break anymore. The worst part is I took advantage of the tome I had with you. And when you were sick I kept my distance because I knew that saying goodbye would make reality hit and id have to face the fact that you would no longer be in my life. But that was my biggest regret not saying goodbye. I love you both and I miss you so much. Goodbye Love, Ari To my old best friend: I hate you for breaking a promise. I hate you for lying to me. I hate you for what you said about me. I hate you for trying to make what you did my fault. I hate you for making me hate you. I hate you so why do I miss you? Love, Ari To Ari: Really? You let the boy who put his hands on you lie you down and take what was so important to you? What were you thinking? You took the drugs handed to you by your 'friend' you lied to your mom about what you were doing. You let yourself drink until you didnt feel your heartbreak and it only got worst in the morning. You believed the lies you heard in the hallways but you couldnt believe the pastor who told you about Gods love. You let yourself form a habbit that could kill you. You let yourself fall apart. You let yourself hurt so many people that meant so much to you. Rememeber what life was like before all of this? When cartoons were the best thing on t.v. and double jumping on the trampoline was the only high that mattered. I miss who you were then. Love, Ari
Search more from @LoveAri
Talk to an expert therapist
Seeking support takes a lot of courage, and you should be proud of yourself for...
Talk to Jill Now
Badges & Awards
2 total badges
Hand Shake Strong Bond I
Report an issue
Feel better with online therapy Professional, confidential and affordable. Start today
Talk to a licensed therapist Wherever you are, whenever you need support. Get matched