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Mahd12
1 55,061 M Confident Walk 2
Anti-Nihilist Muslim Man
PathStep 17 Compassion hearts3,912 Forum posts95 Forum upvotes194 Current upvotes194 Age GroupTeen Last activeSeptember, 2026 Member sinceJanuary 9, 2026
Bio



"The heart more than blood alone--bonding with the non-organic and caring for the damned"
"The right to maintain humanity is not archived on any doctrine--it is a right that you must fight against meaninglessness for"


May Allah forgive us all, and may He forgive me for my sins know bounds none

Qur'an 55:13: "Then which of your Lord's favors will you [Man and Jinn] both deny?"


I am Mahd12(or Mahmood)
I am 16(birthday!!) from the Middle East

I have lived through a lot and I am working on:
-Anger Issues/a lot of mood swings

-existential terror

-Returning to my religion

-Studying more often as I enjoy it; fighting severe procrastination

-Trying to live life better and do new things

-Trying to formulate my thoughts into a coherent philosophy

Hobbies:
-Writing prose or philosophical works

-Listening to music

-Building with Lego

-Not much else, trying to work on that

My triggers:

-i get triggered by s**ual stuff

-i get triggered by hateful things

-i get triggered by violence

if i leave a chat after hearing these it aint personal its just my mind starts saying things to me after them 

-pls just be nice!
-inform me if im being a bad friend ):

Chase the Sun!🌅🌅








Recent forum posts
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My faith and my other issues.
Religion & Spirituality / by Mahd12
Last post
July 24th
...See more Trigger warning: sexual stuff and mentions. so i have some sexual ocds and they really make my life a living nightmare sometimes, most times its dormant but when they do activiate my brain starts saying bad things that i dont like and then i am already always tired and stressed and then my existential intrusive thoughts come in and make me feel sad and terrible i mean i know troubles are a good thing, it is how Allah(swt) tests a good believer but i dont say im a good believer i very very rarely read Qur'an now and i cant pray on time anymore, sometimes i dont even pray
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vent
Religion & Spirituality / by Mahd12
Last post
May 27th
...See more @sociableRaspberries320
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i feel so mean(trigger warning)
General Support / by Mahd12
Last post
May 20th
...See more i just feel so *** mean in the chatrooms i try to help people or i enter the room(support room) to see someone venting and i cant help because i dont know what to say and ive been so tired and dry and i myself am getting better but now i feel selfish 
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'Look at me, Physics.' 'I want you to gaze upon the being you hold up, and fear it.'
Poetry / by Mahd12
Last post
May 29th
...See more Trigger warning!!!: Blood, death, existential crises, religion, uses caps a lot Read at your own risk!! 'ENTROPY! I challenge you TO FIGHT ME! Disregard your conceptual being and materialize! I fear you no longer! STARE AT ME! STARE AT MY BARE BONES! STARE! See it, the scars that both blades, bullet, and YOU have left me!'  "Entropy does not wish to respond." 'NO! MY BATTERED BEING REMAINS SHAKEN AND MY BLOOD DISSONANT FROM MY NERVE FIBERS! I AM NOT DONE WITH YOU!' 'ENTROPY! You fear me! You are always under your father, Physics. If you... akin to rotting meat and swirling sin when compared to your other mathematical kin--does not wish to anger me... then I shall anger your father.'  "Entropy is not terrified nor is Entropy amused nor am EYE going to engage with such an elemental object, so puny, so soft, so insignificant, so bound to ME, and so terrified of the things you see, the smells you must ingest and the horrors you must cognitively, painfully--finitely savor."  'Bring me to your father. You are insufferable, vermin, beast, and hoarder! You do not deserve to be called anything human-like. Your nature is indescribably vile. You do not feel, I am talking to Thanatos' agent. Why waste my time, my 'elements' and my metal on a puny, unconscious... idea.'  "Entropy does not talk to a being that wastes." 'PHYSICS! I DO NOT FOLLOW YOU, I FOLLOW THE CREATOR, THE MERCY, AND THE LOVE THAT MADE YOU! I LOVE YOU PHYSICS! I LOVE MATHEMATICS AND I LOVE SCIENCE AND THE ARTS OF THOUGHT, CHEMISTRY, AND COGNITION! HEAR! Hear. Hear. Hear this call of mine, does it anger you? That my conscience loves you, even when you try to undermine me! DESTROY me! Does that anger you? Vile rodent you are, a cornerstone in the ecosystem of reality, but BOUND just like I AM to it!' - ... -  - Punished. -  - Punished by existing, just like me. You will die. I won't - 'Look at me, Physics.' - Why must EYE? Why must EYE? - 'I want you to gaze upon the being you hold up, and fear it.' 'Fear my ability to die. Fear the blood that spills when my arm rots from diseases you carry.'  - Why must EYE be scared? Just as my son, I am not bound to your diseases, or to your blood. In a way, EYE am quite amused at your attempt to evade me. - 'That is why you should be terrified of me. I am not attempting to evade you. I will end you. With all the conscience I have and the love born as a result. I follow GOD! Glory be to Him. He created you, just as he did me, but I was made solely to worship and to live well and love. You are the process that holds me. I am above you, but forever under God.' "Entropy... agrees. Shakily." - Physics cannot love nor fear. How am EYE scared? -  'That is consciousness.' 'Welcome to the most beautiful purgatory of all.' - NO. Physics, EYE, and my son... -  "I feel it. I am in terror. I do not wish to be human, Father." - Entropy? EYE need warmth. - 'Thermodynamics and homeostasis ***!' - nO -  " yeS EYE sEe.,. " 'I have materialized you. Now fight me. I am no longer scared of you. Because you do not own me. You will bleed for the first time in your immortal eternities. You will bleed again. And again. And again. Until you are dry.' 'Take out your thousands of blades. None will win against the hormones and emotions that you claim to run.'  'I am no longer scared of YOU, or of The Clock, or Flame. Or Nuclei. Or Pull. Or Push. Or Run.' - EYE am truly honored to fight philosophy itself. -  "ArE yOU hOnoREd to FiGHt uS?" 'In the name of my Creator alone.'
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friends
General Support / by Mahd12
Last post
May 21st
...See more @wishmakerYuki @CL0WNPAWZ7 hello 
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ode to my friends
General Support / by Mahd12
Last post
May 18th
...See more @lovelyAiko @Miljan @midnightlily00 i hope you all are ok : D please message me when you guys are back! i miss you guys
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bye
General Support / by Mahd12
Last post
May 11th
...See more I am leaving(for real this time lol, i no longer need this space) i have loved my time here but i am too angry, too dry, and too blunt to be on this website any longer--i preferably would not want to return but if i do return it might be only for a forum post or for a listener chat.  this website has helped me a lot and i love that but i cant be here anymore it is starting to make me unhappy @lovelyAiko @silvercurtains @0Rixie0 @midnightlily00 @bubblePerson5643 thank you all truly for everything amazing you have done for me, @ more people cuz i cant remember users, i call people by nicknames  im sorry i will forever cherish this place <3
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