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NotMyRealName666
435 M Embraced 3
PathStep 15 Compassion hearts21 Forum posts13 Forum upvotes11 Current upvotes11 Age GroupAdult Last activeNovember, 2021 Member sinceAugust 30, 2021
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General listener?
General Support / by NotMyRealName666
Last post
 September 19th, 2021
...See more Lately I've been having a lot of problems, so it would be hard to focus just on one. I would appreciate a listener who doesn't mind hearing all my problems. Just to name s few: Anxiety, family problems, school stress, work stress, a little bit of depression, etc.
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I don't know what is happening to me
Anxiety Support / by NotMyRealName666
Last post
 August 31st, 2021
...See more There's been a lot of things going on ever since quarantine started and I've been feeling miserable. Every day is a new panick attack and one day I can wake up feeling blue and deciding to sleep and cry all day, and the next day I can wake up feeling anxious and having this need of do something.
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Breaking up with my dad
Family & Caregivers / by NotMyRealName666
Last post
 August 31st, 2021
...See more Well, just wanted to clarify some things: I'm new and English is not my first language, is just that's easier to talk about this in a language otherr than Spanish. When I was a kid I used to think my dad was the best, even though he wasn't there or even though I barely saw him. But he was my dad, and I loved him with all my heart. I used to think our relationship was perfect, until I grew up and I began realizing what really happened. I realized that I barely saw him, luckily twice or thrice a month, but is was enough for little me. I realized that going out with him meant we weren't going to spend time together because the scenarios would be the same: 1. He would pick me up and I would be ignored so he could visit his family or friends. 2. I would be ignored so he could go shopping for himself or anyone but me and it wouldn't matter because, at the end he would buy me with a candy or something. 3. I would be ignored so he could have a date. 4. I would be ignored so he could spend time with his other kids. 5. Maybe, and just maybe he would take me to a park and I would be happy thinking I had the best dad. Of course, a kid doesn't know about child support and how it is until your mom sues him and your dad takes it on you, so he punishes you by ignoring you for months. And he calls some day and you are happy because daddy is back. And you have to grow up to see that his miserable chil support doesn't cover anything. And you are worried about your future, and he starts pushing you into quitting school and get a job. And you try to talk to him, but he stops the car and drags you out saying your mom should pay for it. And he ignores you for almost a year. And now you are 18, and you are in college, and he doesn't want to help you, so you sue him. And you prepare yourself, but the judge is on his side and you lost it. So, the relationship is broken. You had to get a part time job, and your daily routine is six hours of school plus seven hours of work and you are tired all day because you barely have four hours of sleep. And once a month he calls you, just to scream at you and say that you are useless because you don't want to work. And now you cry almost every night because you hate him, but you still love him. And the saddest thing is that, you don't really hate him for what he did, you hate him because he wants you to believe it is your fault. And you hate him because he ruined your concept of love and parenthood.
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