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huiny254
1 2,952 M Hopeful Heart 7
PathStep 15 Compassion hearts242 Forum posts58 Forum upvotes168 Current upvotes168 Age GroupTeen Last activeSeptember, 2026 Member sinceAugust 7, 2025
Bio

Working on self-forgiveness.

Recent forum posts
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Give up
Depression Support / by huiny254
Last post
August 31st
...See more I don't know for sure what caused me to sexualize myself so much when I was that young. The problematic stuff I did and saw in that period of time until teen years makes me feel a deep hatred towards myself, I don't want to live a life where I constantly think of ending it but I feel so guilty when I just live my life.
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Guilt
OCD & Related Behaviors / by huiny254
Last post
September 5th
...See more I feel so horrible I started to miss the days my biggest issues were family struggles and social anxiety. I don't deserve to wake up next morning but I don't deserve to find that peace either.
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Changing
General Support / by huiny254
Last post
October 17th, 2025
...See more I wish I had no voice. People wouldn't think I'm rude for not talking, I wouldn't be able to argue with the ones I love.. I just had an argument with my mom. What even is the point in trying to be good when I am too stubborn and I can barely underdtand myself? Maybe like this I would've been calmer.
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Failure
General Support / by huiny254
Last post
October 12th, 2025
...See more I had a test, I'm really scared because I didn't study and I didn't know anything. I feel like a failure, a few of my classmates cheated but I was in the front and I couldn't. Now I'll be the dumbest in the whole classroom I am scared
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Social anxiety
Anxiety Support / by huiny254
Last post
September 22nd, 2025
...See more It's the second week of school, things didn't get any better. I didn't properly speak with anyone and I sit alone. I am tired I just want one friend but I'm so afraid to talk.
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Changes
General Support / by huiny254
Last post
September 13th, 2025
...See more School started, living alone is a big change. School isn't the best so far, the teachers are mostly nice and some really put me in a good mood and my classmates seem nice, but I haven't really had a good talk with any of them. I feel good even when someone tells me "hi". I still hope for that new start I wished for in highschool, I also sit alone unlike everyone else. I want someone to just randomly come and talk to me and become friends soo bad. Today I walked in classroom and I didn't say hi first, but someone told me that when I walked to my seat and I felt bad for not saying it after. I will try to cover my dark circles next time so I will look a little bit more friendly and alive
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OCD
General Support / by huiny254
Last post
May 14th
...See more Just realized what real event OCD is. I could have that combined with the false memory one and POCD. It's bad to self diagnose but I see myself in so many posts about that stuff, I was sexually exploring stuff as a child and teen with my addiction, which led me watch bad things for pleasure when I never liked that in reality. Porn addiction is the worst.. The guilt is the worst.. especially that SA scene from the horror movie. I never wished that upon anyone, no one deserves that. I apologize, I didn't know how disrespectful that is, especially that it was based on real events.. gruesome events. And I feel like it isn't even about events anymore, I feel like a weird person with weird f3tishes. From the age of 9.
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Past
General Support / by huiny254
Last post
September 11th, 2025
...See more Okay, I felt a little sleepy when I woke up in the morning so I took the chance to sleep until my family came back in 3 hours. I didn't wanna stay alone. But I woke up when they came and I had that feeling of sleeping forever to not feel guilt. My body feels tired, my heart is beating either too slow or too fast, I can't tell. I deserve that for my actions, but I just want it to end so I can enjoy it.. this was the worst summer break and I will probably never have a good one from now on
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