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shySpring4931
587 M Embraced 4
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts34 Forum posts18 Forum upvotes16 Current upvotes16 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2022 Member sinceOctober 25, 2018
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Not sure what emotion i am feeling
Depression Support / by shySpring4931
Last post
 April 8th, 2022
...See more Hey , i apologise for any grammatical errors in advance. I don't know many people in my life and not very close with my family . But whenever something good happens in someone's life or if someone ik achieves something. I truly want to be happy for them . But i end up comparing myself to them and how i have not achievements in life and that i don't have anything good and i am useless pathetic person. I don't understand if this is jealousy or envy or it's just a general insecurity i have and my hatred for myself. I don't know how to categorize this emotion and how to deal with this . If anyone has any tips please share , this is something that makes it very difficult for me to have any sort of relationship with anyone. I am not able to feel happy for anyone else . I really hate this about me and want to stop feeling this way but it's so difficult the harder i try to be happy for someone the more depressed i get for me. Thanks for reading .
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How do I go for therapy
Depression Support / by shySpring4931
Last post
 March 27th, 2022
...See more I have been two therapy before in 2018 and 2019. But i am never able to do it properly, i don't tell everything to my therapist, and both times i was suggested to go through proper CBT but the tasks given to me were never completed by me and i used to lie about feeling better and getting better, going to the therapist started to seem like a daunting and tough task and i hated it , i hated lying but somehow i just couldn't bring myself to tell the truth ti my therapist. And both times i stopped going to therapy because it felt useless since I couldn't be honest. Sometimes i am scared that what if maybe i am so used to being depressed that i don't want to get better that i have built me personality and my identity around my depression and anxitey as well and i just don't know what. Person i will be if i do get and better. Can someone guide me on how I can do therapy better and how to get the courage and strength to go through therapy and how to be ready to get better.
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Scared to open up
Depression Support / by shySpring4931
Last post
 March 23rd, 2022
...See more An incident happened today , my sister's friend came over for lunch and i was reading a book , when she saw me she started talking to me and asked me about my top five favourite books. I blanked out. This is not the first time , whenever someone asks me about my choices like my favourite music , books , movies or anything related i generally end up saying i don't have any favourites if someone asks me my opinion on a movie i end up saying i don't have any. I am sure this makes me come across as a boring person. But i am too scared to open up to people, i am scared that if i tell them the type of books i like to read or the name of my favourite movie they are gonna judge me , and make fun of me. And sometimes this nature of mine makes other people think that i am weird or too secretive or that i have a lot of attitude and i don't want to be friends with them. And i end up alone and depressed.
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Loneliness
Depression Support / by shySpring4931
Last post
 March 21st, 2022
...See more I don't want to be alone anymore. I am tired of trying to make friends . I have never had friends , i was alone in my school in my my college. I wish I had a better life I wish I was a better person. I wish I had a life like a normal kid , with a lot of friends , parties going out to places. But i never was and i still am not good enough to be able to make friends . Everyone is so better than me, no one wants to hang out with a loser. I don't want to be friends with me either. A few people who do speak to me i am unable to follow through on that friendship, i get scared that if they come close they will see that i am not good enough, i am dumb pathetic and an idiot . I am tired of this loneliness. I have a lot of anger and hatred in me. I don't know why my whole life was wasted. I have lost many years and they will never come back. And i have no one else to blame but me. I drown Myself in tv series and movies to run away from the loneliness to run away from how much i hate myself for not being good enough. I am too tired to try anymore i have tried a lot in the past nothing works i can't change who i am i can't be better.
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Hi everyone
Depression Support / by shySpring4931
Last post
 March 13th, 2022
...See more Hello people, i am new here i still don't know how 7 cups works . I have been struggling with depression and anxitey i have had prescribed medications and therapy but somehow it doesn't go away and i feel too exhausted to go to therapy. For a while i was doing ok but since last few months it's getting more difficult. I hope joining 7 cups would be the step i needed to gain my strength back to get back on track . Thanks
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