Did I do too much?
I’m in my early 20’s and am still in the weird spot where I pay for most of my finances but I’m still under my parents health and car insurance. Recently, my mom bought a luxury purse using my credit card because there’s no interest rate on it but it was $3,500. I don’t make much money so it wasn’t a small favor for me. I paid the bag off because I didn’t want to ruin my credit score but it took away from my rainy day savings. Initially, I thought they were going to pay me right back but it’s been about two weeks and she’s only paid me $500 back so far. While she was paying me, she was telling me to give her the car payment for her old car I drive which is about $370 anyway. I sent a bunch of long texts communicating why I felt uncomfortable with the situation and why I would’ve appreciated her being upfront with the plan to pay me back being laid out. She didn’t take it well and now they’re telling me to start paying for my own insurance if I was going to be stingy like this. I even told her she could take her time paying me back, it’s just that I needed to know how it was going to happen but I don’t think it got across to her. It’s going to be a deep cut into my finances and now I’m wondering if I went too far? My company has health insurance but I know it won’t cover the mental health care I’m currently receiving so I’m not sure if I can continue if I have to pay out of pocket. Any advice?
@agreeableSpring1274
I'm so sorry to hear that! It seems to me that you were absolutely in the right. Your financial situation is more delicate at the moment than your parents', so them borrowing money from you is not the same as the other way around. Also, insurance is a necessity, but a purse isn't. Having to stay in that situation without making your concerns clear would have taken a toll on your mental health too.
I wish I had good advice on how to cover your mental healthcare on your own... All I can think of is that you might try talking to your parents again, after they have calmed down. You might make a plan to save up for mental healthcare and communicate to them that you are doing your best to become independent in that regard, but might need some time. Still, you were absolutely right to express your concerns and boundaries!
@agreeableSpring1274,
not advice but your mom is way out of line.
She used you to buy an expensive.....bag? Not a great sign of maturity.
@agreeableSpring1274I hope this isn't inappropriate or doesn't come.off wrong, but I make nearly 30 dollars an hour which is a lot to most people, yet your throwing around amounts of money in your post that would completely change the trajectory of my entire year. 370.dollars!!? That would make or break me rn. 3 thousand dollars!!!!!!!!?? I couldn't imagine. I simply could not imagine. If someone put me nearly 4 grand in the hole right now it would quite literally ruin my life. However I was.kicked out at 18 and never got any support so I got a car apt and everything on my own which is actually a terrible way to start life. I don't recommend at all, but I did give me perspective on being independent and I gotta say if you were 100% on your own which you may very well be soon, 3,500 dollars would be fighting words. Like that's shelter. Relocation fees, transportation. I can change my life with that much money. Im honestly curious as to what you and your mother do for a living, but let me end my rant. I think you handled it well and you should aim to separate your credit from your mother as she is jeopardizing your financial safety. Bad credit means you can't get a place to live, can't get a car, nothing. Even if you can afford it. It is great she's helping you but it's not worth your financial health. Let me know if I'm being too negative or judgy and I'll delete this post not trying to offend!
