Feeling Distant in My Relationship, Just Needed to Talk Somewhere

Hi. I’m in a relationship that’s about five months old, and I’ve been feeling really emotionally lonely in it lately.

At first, things felt really good. We were spending weekends together, having fun, and it felt like something was building. But over time, I started to notice that while I was getting more emotionally attached, he wasn’t really expressing much! not talking about his feelings, not saying he missed me, not telling me how he felt about me at all.

There’s also a big difference in how we see family. He’s very involved with his, especially now that his dad is seriously ill. I understand and respect that really, but I also went through something similar in a past relationship that ended painfully, and now I can feel myself getting triggered by the same pattern: me feeling like I come second, and him not being emotionally available.

I’ve tried to talk to him a few times. I’ve been vulnerable. But I feel like he doesn’t really want to go deep, and I’m just tired of being the only one trying to communicate. So now, I’ve pulled back emotionally. I’m just observing. I still care about him, but I’ve stopped pushing. I don’t feel wanted, or prioritized, and that makes me sad.

I moved countries for grad school, I don’t have family here, and I think I got emotionally attached because this relationship felt like a safe space. But now that it doesn’t, I just feel really alone.

I don’t know what I’m asking for. Maybe I just needed to say it somewhere.

Thanks for reading.