I (26M) miss my best friend (F23).
About a year ago, I lost a lot of friends (Mostly M) because of some drama caused by a new person (23F) in the group. It really broke my trust in people for a while. A few weeks later, another new person (also 23F) joined, and we became friends quickly. She noticed something was bothering me, got me to open up one night, and we became best friends in no time. Things got better with her around, we were enjoying every day as it came together.
I pulled away for a few days because I wasn’t in a good place, and she got upset. Some time ago, we had a big fight, and she cut me off. After that, I started therapy, worked on myself, and got better. Eventually, she took me back, and things felt good for a while. But now she hardly talks to me.
She’s become closer with one of my good friends and they hang out and talk a lot. When I text her, it usually takes her a day to reply, but she responds to him instantly. I told her how I felt, and she said they’re just friends and that our bond hasn’t changed. But her actions tell me otherwise, and it hurts. "She's there but still not there" kind of feeling.
TL;DR: Part of me feels like letting go, but another part hopes things can go back to how they were if I just hold on. I don’t know what’s best. How do I recover from this?
@purpleCar6052
It can be hard to recover from a break in trust.
But we can never find our happiness in one person.
You matter.
Your feelings are valid.
It's just an instinctual thing, we know when someone is not fully invested.
Don't make any rash decisions.
But always you should get the same energy back that you put in.
Should never be one-sided or ever have to beg for someone's attention.
You deserve better!
💕💜
I'll keep it short. Have a hard conversation with her telling/asking her everything that you are concerned with for example how her actions doesn't match her words "our bond hasn't changed" And everything else that's bothering you. Now most important thing be ready to let her go this is the most important thing being an adult you can't dream of friends that you had before. And imo she is gaslighting coz clearly it's not the same so yeah. Take care man.
