Sorry for the rant
I'm fed up with living with Schizophrenia. It severely distorts my reality and I'm just tired.
It takes so much energy to manage emotions and thoughts and to maintain peace and self control in general. Having to manage voices (where I can constantly hear everyone's thoughts) as well as the usual stuff is taking more energy and care than I have to give to myself right now.
I wish I knew what was real sometimes. It's very isolating.
I'm just tired. I still have love for myself. I'm just tired.
Hugs to you. I don’t know exactly what you’re experiencing, but I sure do know what it feels like to be tired. xx
@Orsina thank you
@Sasher
I'm taken by your clear understanding of your situation and am learning a lot from your postings. One thing to keep in mind is your own capacity to work on expaning your self-discovery process, which can help you find the best way for yourself to build up your mental health resources over time.
Sure, it's nice to have a better social environment and nicer people around us to help us heal, learn and do more productive or creative work. Ultimately, the healing process, just like growing up from childhood, is also a learning process we have to go through on our own to feel the experience we can gain which will show us the next best step to take, or maybe to avoid ... depending on our own situation and the choices we can see awailable to us at the time.
Building up your own resources is a good way to widen your options to select from in that life long learning process, we can all see ourselves going through. The BIG suprise comes into clearer focus when you start to understand your own mind better, day by day, und your emotions have less power over the satisfaction you can enjoy in your own right, being more of an intellectually motivated mature person who understands his emotional reality so well, that dealing with pain und discofort or setbacks of any kind, are just like the waves in the ocean ... your own substance is the wastnes of the sea below where your essence can be found by relentlesly refining your own mental capcity for as long as you can.
Best wishes and suppoert in your healing and learning process! <3
@Sasher
Must be incredibly challenging to manage the distortions it brings to your reality and the constant energy required to maintain emotional well being. Feeling isolated is a common experience for many people with schizophrenia as it can be difficult to distinguish what is real and what is not, which adds to the sense of loneliness and disconnection.
Please remember to be gentle and patient with yourself. It's okay to feel tired and to acknowledge the difficulties you're going through. You are deserving of love and support, and there are resources available to help you on your journey. Keep reaching out for help. You are resilient, and there is hope for better days ahead!
@patientSky1754 yes definitely one of the common features.
I'm okay now/better than I was, things have calmed down a bit.
Thanks and take care 🤍
@Sasher, Have you tried Therapy Dear, I know it is very difficult to manage it, without help
@nj1968 yes. I've had a lot of therapy over the years. Am currently doing EMDR
Hi Sasher, schizophrenia reminds me the paradox of the "bread and butter-fly" which has the head made of sugar while wings are made of bread and butter. The bread and butter-flies eat light tea with cream, so they are caught with two exhausted thoughts: if they eat will die and if they don't eat will die as well... and, paradoxically, in the end they'll die because of their thoughts. The fact is that real (or unique) world does not exist, what we all experience is our or, worse still, others description of realities. In our mind there are not butterflies, tables, chairs, computers... in our mind there are representations of things and what matters is our ideas of such things
@doublebind of course a healthy Mindset is important to get through any struggle in life
I would use the expression "changeable mindset" to keep the idea I expressed above, but it's ok, whatever... the matter is that we don't stuck with a unique meaning of things... for example, the word itself schizophrenia... what is it? Is it a disease or is it a skill treated like a disease from the virtuous society?
@doublebind or is it something induced into a person like suggestes by Gregory Bateson in his double bind theory?
@Sasher exactly! There's a lot to take from Gregory about schizophrenia and more :)
Hi Sasher! As a daughter of a woman with schizophrenia and paranoia I have only this to tell you. Don't be sorry for opening up and writing about your issues here. Don't be sorry for seeking help. Don't be sorry for admitting something's not right. It's not ranting. This platform exist to help people like you and me.
My mom never admitted she has schizophrenia or any kind of psychological problem. She was always like a barking dog, knowing everything best and acting like everything's okay. Everybody was always afraid to tell her anything and if they did, they'd get a blast back to bleed out. If she was at least 1% honest to herself and modest like you she and all our family would be so much better today. Maybe I wouldn't have any suicidal thoughts and psychological issues from so much pain she caused me.
No, you're not ranting. You're seeking help. And you are so courageous to do so. I wish mom had your courage. Man I wish I had your courage. Write whatever's in your mind and never give up. I know it's hard but you're not alone.
- @mish3l ♥ thank you! I'm sorry sorry about what you've been through and hope you get all the love and honesty you deserve 🤍
it's okay, it's not your fault :) But thanks ❤️
@Sasher aww bless you ❤❤ disabilities are not easy and very draining. Stay strong keep fighting. Gives you a giant tiny hug
@Tinywhisper11 thank you ♥
@Sasher
Hi Sasher!
I hear you.
It must be really exhausting and extremely distressing at times.
I wish to recognize how, even bearing this heavy burden, you are so loving and supportive of other members in this Community.
You give much love and support, and you are loved here by many.
I appreciate you a lot and hugely admire you.
My PM is always open to you for whatever I might be of help.
Always yours,
Marcelo.
@HealingTalk thank you. It comes from knowing that no matter what psychological pain I'm going through, no matter what is being inflicted upon me - or anything else for that matter - that I still have a good heart, it still cares and there's always a healthy way out.
@Sasher
I have met you here and there a number of times by now.
And you always surprise me. You are always even better than I remembered you.
You are so good and caring. So wise!
You leave me speechless.
Thank you for being here.
@HealingTalk hope all is good Healing. Thanks and take care 🤍
@Sasher
💛 💛 💛
@Sasher
I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through such a challenging time right now, but I want you to know that you're not alone in this. Living with schizophrenia can indeed be incredibly demanding, both mentally and emotionally. It's okay to feel tired and overwhelmed sometimes; your feelings are valid.
You've already shown great strength in acknowledging that you still have love for yourself despite the difficulties you're facing. That self-love is a powerful source of resilience. Remember, it's okay to take breaks and prioritize self-care when needed. You don't have to carry the weight of managing everything all the time.
Though it might seem like you're trapped in an isolating reality, there are people who care about you and want to help you find moments of clarity and peace. Please don't hesitate to reach out to them, and remember that your journey is unique, but you're never alone in it.
You've already demonstrated great resilience, and I believe that you can continue to find ways to manage and cope with your experiences. Be kind to yourself and take things one step at a time. You've got this, and there is hope for a better, more manageable future ahead.
Feel free to drop me a private message, whenever you need an uplifting conversation. 😊
@KidnappedByAxolotls thank you
Please try to keep fighting to stay ok...if you need someone to talk with I'm here ...and sure many nice people here are willing to help and keep encouraging you to find that happiness that you deserve. Meanwhile I send you a big friendly hug from Spain.
@Park2139 thank you