How can I be aware of Still Open Emotional Wounds?
Greetings guys.
Been away from here for a couple of years.
I'm in a relationship with my girlfriend and this weekend is out third year anniversary.
But not everything is bliss.
Been having a rough patch yesterday and after we argued, I went into an Urgent Mental Health service. In the middle of the conversation it came into surface that "I Still have emotional wounds (not scars)". I felt a bit disoriented. The issue is that my next therapist appointment is in 3 months, and no inmediate schedule or any closer.
I have a major lack of knowledge on how to distinguish an emotional scar from a wound. I need some orientation from fellow users since I need to ground down what's going on since i'm worried of my relationship.
Since I've been away for a long time I'm not fully sure If this post is within rule.
I'm deeply worried, not in crisis. Just need some ideas to begin with, since I'm absolutely dumb on that kind of stuff since somehow I'm "emotionally blind" since I'm not sure if that lack of awareness fits on that description.
Thanks in advance.
@JohnDoe00 Hi. How are you? i hope you are doing well.
It’s good that you’re reaching out and reflecting on your emotional state. These are some ways that will help you understand and work through what you’re experiencing.
Understanding Emotional Wounds vs. Scars
- An emotional wound is active pain—it still affects your emotions, behaviors, and relationships. It can feel raw, reactive, and unresolved. Certain situations might trigger strong emotions that feel disproportionate or difficult to control.
- An emotional scar, on the other hand, is healed but still visible—you may remember the pain, but it no longer disrupts your present life. You might feel a pang of sadness or regret, but it doesn’t control your emotions or reactions.
From what you’ve shared, it sounds like there are unresolved emotions or experiences that still impact you, particularly in moments of stress or conflict.
Grounding Yourself & Next Steps
Here are some ways to begin processing this on your own:
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Self-Reflection: Ask yourself:
- What situations tend to trigger strong emotions for me?
- Do these reactions feel familiar—like they’re connected to past experiences?
- What emotions come up most strongly: anger, sadness, fear, shame?
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Emotional Awareness Exercises:
- Try journaling about what you felt during the argument and the visit to urgent care.
- Use the "Name it to Tame it" technique: Identify the exact emotion you’re feeling (e.g., “I feel abandoned” instead of just “I feel bad”).
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Mindfulness & Self-Compassion:
- When strong emotions arise, pause and acknowledge them without judgment.
- Remind yourself that healing is a process and emotional wounds don’t mean you’re broken.
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Relationship Communication:
- If you feel safe doing so, consider having an open conversation with your partner about your emotions—without blaming, just sharing.
- Express how you’re feeling and what you need (e.g., “I realized I still have some unresolved emotions, and I might need some patience and understanding while I work through them”).
When to Seek More Immediate Support
If your distress becomes overwhelming, seeking interim support (like at 7cups; support group, online counseling, or self-help resources) can help bridge the gap until your next session.
You’re not alone in this. Recognizing that there are wounds rather than scars is actually a sign of emotional growth—it means you’re becoming aware of what needs healing. Be patient with yourself as you navigate this process.
@JohnDoe00 Hey JohnDoe. Thank you for sharing. So you have still have some emotional wounds to dive deep into. Have you ever considered meditation or being in silence for a few days? Often during moments of conflicts, it's important to take a minute to find solitude as the answers to your emotional wounds can be found and dealt with. There is a man name "Thic Nhat Hanh", who is a Buddhist monk and has founded Plum Village. In a simple gist, meditation can really help with whatever is currently happening in your life. Good luck with everything. Everything will be okay.
I would start with finding a new therapist. It sounds like your other one is having scheduling issues? Mental health doesn’t take a break while your therapist does. What are you supposed to do for the next 3 months? Just sit at home and wait for the next wall to cave in? If something this bad happened that sent you to mental health services, that is something that needs to be assessed and dealt with ASAP. Not trying to be rude, but I’m concerned for you.
To me, emotional wounds and scars are kind of interconnected? A scar is an emotional wound that has healed. An emotional wound is something that is still open and on the surface and hasn’t been dealt with yet. Something that is unresolved or a chapter that hasn’t been closed due to no resolution. I would think in people that are “emotionally blind” as you say, you may not realize that you have open wounds until someone stabs their finger in it. Nothing wrong with not knowing, but therapy would help you identify what those wounds are. what the triggers are, and how to successfully navigate them. Please feel free to reach out if I can help at all!