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Marriage confusion

User Profile: SheWalksInMoonlight4
SheWalksInMoonlight4 May 18th, 2023

I’ll keep it short and sweet. Up to what limit do you stay when your husband and daughter (from another relationship) do not get along? He tries nothing to have a relationship with her.


Side note, this man doesn’t keep a job and I’ve lost everything supporting him and our family. I lost all my savings, my credit to buy a home, and any chance I have at the life I want. I’ve held on bc he has a good heart and I genuinely love him but I’m so tired.

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User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 May 18th, 2023

@SheWalksInMoonlight4

Only you know your limit ........

i would have left by now.... but that is me .................people can have a good heart and you can be in love with them ......At a certain point actions speak far louder then words.....

what were the expectations before you married? ... did he make plans and promises that have never happened ? What is your hesitation ?............. do you think he will snap out of it and restore your money and credit....?

getting along with your daughter and Job .... and plans for the future.... ?

IMO it is like a gambler losing continual but somehow keep betting to win big and even up.

User Profile: SheWalksInMoonlight4
SheWalksInMoonlight4 OP May 19th, 2023

You’ve said exactly what I feel on the inside. I used to think he’d change and be successful at the business op he’s been trying at for years. Think of the movie acrimony. I’m hesitant bc deep down, I love him, I just don’t trust him or see him the same bc it’s been broken promise after broken promise. I’m so heartbroken and we’re still married.

1 reply
User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 May 19th, 2023

@SheWalksInMoonlight4

It is hard sometimes we want to hold on to something even if broken because we worry what if nothing else is out there ......... what if it is worse..... Notice MANY do not assumes the next chapter will be awesome or great but often worry about the worst....

He has no reason to improve as long as you support him and let him be an ***.

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User Profile: BenittaJ
BenittaJ May 19th, 2023

@SheWalksInMoonlight4 hugs tats hard girl. Feels like my sister's story she's taking care of him *** jobless, useless, brainless, but nothing less with attitude, domination, he's good for nothing. I hope you decide something soon and i hope my sister does too.

User Profile: purplelady568
purplelady568 May 20th, 2023

@SheWalksInMoonlight4 - Wow, that sounds excruciatingly exhausting. If I were losing relationships, my home, and life savings due to another person, I don't think I could keep it up. If I were you, I would consider a separation. It sounds like this man may need to take a break and reset his priorities.

I am sorry you are going through this. It sounds like tremendous pressure on you, as well as your daughter.

User Profile: SheWalksInMoonlight4
SheWalksInMoonlight4 OP May 21st, 2023

You all are so amazing with your answers. Thank you for the support from wherever you are! Much love and lots of hugs!

1 reply
User Profile: purplelady568
purplelady568 May 21st, 2023

@SheWalksInMoonlight4 you're so welcome. I am glad that you are feeling somewhat supported during this very stressful time in your life. Please reach out to a listener if you would like to talk more in-depth about what you are going through, and what your next steps might be.

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User Profile: yellowSquare12
yellowSquare12 September 20th, 2023

I hope by now you have figured out something. How old are you makes a difference in how we decide as well i think.

User Profile: Inventiveday0411
Inventiveday0411 September 20th, 2023

This sounds so much like my husband… I didn’t leave (we have 2 kids together) and now my daughter won’t speak to me… it kills me… only you know your limits… But things will evolve either good or bad as time moves on…

User Profile: Themaninblackxxx
Themaninblackxxx September 22nd, 2023

@SheWalksInMoonlight4

Do you really need us to tell you?

He has a good heart. That's great. Good luck to him

but he is no good for you

Leave him now, the sooner the better