Struggling Long Distance Relationship
I'm a 36 m and I have a long distance gf, 33. We met online and decided we were interested in a relationship shortly after. I have minor anxiety, and she has more crippling anxiety. We do calls, video calls, texting all the time, etc. When things are good, they're great. But part of her anxiety causes severe lack of self confidence and depression. She's in therapy, which is good, but I struggle to help and support her. When she's in a bad mood she lashes out, blames me for things or tells me that I'm not actually interested her. Calls herself ugly and unlovable, and if I tell her otherwise she says I'm lying. It's hard and hurts sometimes, but I've learned to deal with it because she always feels bad and apologizes later. I just want to help and support her but I don't know how, and feel like I'm failing. Looking for some guidance from anyone in a similar situation, or how they handle it.
@pinkCar6517
you are not alone and i think it is one of the hardest things is to support and encourage those when they are feeling like that ......it sucks the life out of a person to be in position to be constantly reassuring only to have it thrown back in your face. apologies do not take that away.
have you had the discussion ...not blaming but saying maybe she can work in her therapy ......
that everyone goes through feeling ugly and less then .....
until she sees that herself ....and quits using it as a way to have you try to soothe and then takes out her frustration out on you ...................... you cannot bring her up because she takes offence to your reassurance and lashes out............ sooner or later the apology seems hollow. i have seen many relationships end over this cycle ........
Welcome!