new here

I'll just cut right to it. I'm 42, mother of one 17 yead old, married 17 years with a separation in there a few years ago. About 23 years ago , I related to a detailed description of high function autism. like aspergers, I guess. but 20+ years ago, that was strictly a boys club. since then I have been diagnosed with depression and general anxiety (about 15 yrs ago). lockdown brought about some stir craziness and unraveling and i looked into personality and mood disorders, relating mostly to borderline, but missing a couple important traits, particularly the attachment thing. i sort of started to allow myself to accept that possibility and read up on it. but a few months later I happened across an article about misdiagnosis of borderline and lo and behold was autism. again. So i read everything. which lead me to WOMEN and asd/aspergers and sort of lost it. it was a holy shit moment. an earth shattering, life changing, eye opening epiphany with a serendipitous twist. i talked to 4 people close to me including my mother, brother, family friend and finally my husband. his response hurt a bit. he just sort of waved it away and said go talk to someone. my mother seemed genuinely concerned but hasnt responed since to the articles i have sent though i know she got them. my brother and family friend both had sort of the same response. no opinion. just "wow thats neat" kind of canned reply. so being pretty fucking alone in this revelation, i found this app. i will say the keyboard functionality is frustrating the flying f k out of me and im going to leave allthe grammatical errors right where they are. (sorry!) but Hi. i just stopped by to say hi and introduce myself. i don't know what else to do past this point. im losing my marbles. nothing makes any sense and simultaneously makes all the sense ever. 😟