50+ Check In - February 23 - 25, 2024 Emotions & You
Happy weekend 50+ Cupsers🙌🙌💕💕
It IS normal to have and experience a wide range of emotions from happy to sad to angry to frustrated to lonely to scared etc.
Emotional intelligence is the ability to manage your emotions and equally understand the emotions of others around you.
Being aware of our own feelings, and regulate how you react in various situation's are key. Empathy provides compassion for others and can help diffuse situations.
Are YOU an emotional person??
How do you regulate your emotions when you are struggling ? What helps??
Do you find it easier to cope with YOUR emotions or OTHERS emotions?
Does your connection to that person make it easier or tougher? ( for instance if it was a friend compared to a family member?)
@SunShineAlwaysGrateful
UPDATED TAGLIST 2/20/2024
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@SunShineAlwaysGrateful
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@SunShineAlwaysGrateful I don't buy the line "you are amazing just the way you are" because it can easily become an excuse to stagnate as a person & not make any attempt to improve oneself. Also, up to now I've always thought of "emotional intelligence" as a contradiction in terms...real intelligence, in my book, is inherently logical. Emotions are anything but logical; they are shortsighted or blind, impulsive, reacting to whatever just occurred without any consideration of possible consequences. It is my belief that the less we are influenced by emotions, the better our lives would be overall.
But hey, I could be wrong.
@slowdecline48 this is my emotions before morning coffee😑😑😑😑😑😐😐😐😐😑😐
then after morning coffee😁😃😄😄😃😁😁
@Tinywhisper11 Good for you. I can't drink coffee, at least not on a daily basis...
@slowdecline48 here have this instead🍺
@slowdecline48
You are correct emotions are not logical at times and sometimes they are … depends how the situation makes you feel. Emotions happen whether we want them to or not. When that happens being able to cope with how you feel is important for self care and understand why others may be reacting to a situation as well.
Logic works when being stoic and as much as I try I seem to be very emotional … hmm is it a gender thing or a person thing ? I do think some are emotional and others are not.
Are YOU an emotional person??
How do you regulate your emotions when you are struggling ? What helps??
Do you find it easier to cope with YOUR emotions or OTHERS emotions?
Does your connection to that person make it easier or tougher? ( for instance if it was a friend compared to a family member?)
I don't know how to regulate my emotions or cope with them.
@WharfRat hugs you tightly ❤
@WharfRat
Yes it is touch to know where to start … I will put some resources tips here for you. Sometimes when emotions are too big it can become overwhelming. Just do what you can when you can is the best policy …
You will get there with practice. That I have no doubt.
Yes, I think I’m an emotional person. I was raised in a family loaded with engineers. My dad devalued emotions and valued logic. However, as I pointed out to him, if he was completely devoid of all emotion, how would we have ever been produced? He would laugh, this was later, when our relationship was better and I was caring for him on hospice. We discovered a rather earthy mind-bending double-edged and gallows humor. Being close to “the other side” (let’s see if the censors allow me to say this) can do that to a person.
One time in conversation the topic came up: how often do you cry. I was with my aunt at the time, a doctor. She said, “I never cry.” I had already cried that morning, and I didn’t want to admit it, so I hid it and just said, “I cry once in awhile.”
But I laugh often too. So I don’t think of “me” as depressed. But yes, emotional, chock full of emotions, yes. All of them. Born with them, will be cold and still without them.
@CalmRosebud I'm sorry your dad passed away😞 but I'm glad you got to know the true version of each other ❤❤ and it's ok to admit to crying.
gives you a giant tiny hug ❤I love you ❤
@Tinywhisper11
Tiny, he would have loved you.
You are an amazing Being and I am so lucky to know you.
Love,
Rose
@CalmRosebud awww your dad sounds almost as sweet as you ❤❤ noones quite as sweet as you though, 🤔🤔🤔 well except me😁
😂😂😂😂😂😂 I love you ❤❤
@CalmRosebud
Yes engineers are logical definitely. My hubby and son are in the autism spectrum and very logical and in science based careers and one learning to be an engineer. I am definitely the emotional one.
Humour is great way to communicate and connect love that.
Never worry about being emotional it is very normal. I think the best thing is to deal with the emotions as they come up is great self care. There are situations where not dealing with them may keep the peace. Only you know best going forward. But DO have a self care plan for how YOU are feeling.
Thank you for sharing.
@CalmRosebud One of my rules of thumb is: while emotions are usually p!ss-poor tools to think with, we still need them in order to stay alive.
Have you ever heard of the paradox of Buridan's [Donkey]?...it's an old concept of late-medieval philosophy. YouRube has plenty of videos about it; a short explanation of the paradox is here.
@SunShineAlwaysGrateful
- Are YOU an emotional person??
I am hypersensitive if I got the question correctly since it largely depends on what you're trying to ask and what your perception of an emotional person might be. For some, they consider emotional people as crybabies or overreactive etc.
- How do you regulate your emotions when you are struggling ? What helps??
Just feeling all the things that I'm feeling at the moment, sitting with the feeling trying understand why am I feeling this way and what can I do about it and labeling my emotions really helps in my case. Sometimes I distract myself and that works too.
- Do you find it easier to cope with YOUR emotions or OTHERS emotions?
Since I grew up being emotionally neglected and was numb living on autopilot for half of my life, No matter how hard I try it's always a little comfortable for me to see someone experiencing negative emotions in front of me. The most difficult thing for me is to find the right words to say and validate them properly and not mess it up even more and to hold myself from saying stupid things like don't cry, or you can do this or try this etc...
- Does your connection to that person make it easier or tougher? ( for instance if it was a friend compared to a family member?)
When shared big feelings or emotions with someone whether it's them or me, and having deep conversation feels satisfying to me and it strengthens my relationship with them more. I do know small talks are important but I would always value deep conversations and sharing vulnerability over small talk anytime.
P.s. Thank you for sharing this post and I'm thankful to receive this post on my feed today.😊
@ThoughtsBubbleExpress yep deep coversations were you both get to show vulnerabilities is definetly something to treasure ❤❤
@Tinywhisper11 Yeah they just feel more meaningful ❤️
@ThoughtsBubbleExpress
Thank you for sharing! Yes many minimize others sometimes being emotional… it isn’t fair because there are reasons for being so.
Your suggestions on dealing with your emotions and others are absolutely wonderful to hear and validate through communication especially long talks.
You are very emotional intelligence is high … incredible skill. I am glad you found this post as well. Take care.
You're welcome @SunShineAlwaysGrateful 😊 I know right? Sometimes hormones or any physical illnesses or mental problems may people to be more sensitive and cry over lisstle things.
Thank you, It hasn't been so long since I learned about Emotional Intelligence, If I'm upset on any matter or feel negative feelings then I use the methods I said earlier but if I get hurt by any of my loved ones then I know it's childish but I don't speak up, and kind of like seal my mouth because I'm afraid of speaking up and it may ruin my relationship with them, mess up or cause the argument to flare up even more so I just shut down, freeze and numb myself.
Take care too ✨
@ThoughtsBubbleExpress
That is where boundaries come into play. I understand that wanting to keep the peace. When you are thinking it through to decide what is best is a smart choice always. Just in the process don’t be too hard on yourself. What other people say and do is on them. You do you!
yes, I think talking after people calm down is good. But shutting off people is bad I think
@SunShineAlwaysGrateful I am a emotional person, how I feel and regulate my emotions, if it's sad or fear, I hide under my blanket and cry. If happy then normally on here telling jokes or spreading love it doing something creative.
I do find it easier to manage other people's emotions, cause I'm pretty good at reading between the lines ❤ unless their emotion is anger, cause them I'll roll away ♿ and hide
What about you sunny, what's your dominant emotion today??
@Tinywhisper11 Crying under a blanket sounds like something I do almost everyday to flush out all the bad feels of the day from my body 😅
@ThoughtsBubbleExpress we'll get a big blanket, and we can both hide under and have our daily cry together ❤❤
@Tinywhisper11 I would love to cry with you, let's cry together, crying alone is boring anyway 😭
@ThoughtsBubbleExpress crying alone is overrated too lol
@Tinywhisper11
I too am an emotional person often overthinker usually. I worry about others a lot. I tend to be a caretaker in ways.
You do bring JOY to 7cups very much. Being able to read other peoples emotions is a gift. ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
I do need to look after myself when emotional for sure to think about what it is that I am emotional about.
One of my partners had a stroke and I am dealing with how best to care for her. I take it one day at a time.
@SunShineAlwaysGrateful your a very strong, beautiful person inside and outside. It's no wonder your an emotional person. You do a lot for others, your one of the sweetest people I know ❤❤ please make sure to look after you too ❤ I love you ❤
@Tinywhisper11
Aww thank you .. always 💕💕🙌🙌
@SunShineAlwaysGrateful
thank you, SunShine..
"im allowed to change my plans"..I suppose. huge, touchy topic though. Ive bought air ticket, flew to a friend, and they aborted plans, thats a few thousand dollars I earned difficultly on that I ain't getting back because someone acted like a child.
I too have occasions I have to change plans and forced to go through them. Been on both sides....liberating to hear "u r allowed to change plans" but i'll tread super, SUPER careful on those words for it seems like broad brush stroke for something unique to each situation
kinda like saying "all cancers are the same" which we know for a fact it's lesson-101 Drs are trained to inform "every cancer is unique"...two cents. Please do not mind the candor.
@serenekite52
i appreciate your candor and absolutely it depends on the situation. So sorry this happened to you. It is incredibly tough to put yourself out there and be vulnerable. 🤗
I hope you are doing lots of self care. Ghosting is never cool. I hope you are doing better now. You are worthy of soo soo much more.
I thought sometimes talking helped. Evidently I must have forgotten how. Talk about emotional talk about scared.
Talking about emotional things can be difficult. I always try to assess if it is worthy of my time as I always try to reduce stress. So sometimes I apply the let them theory … if someone is saying or doing something I don’t prefer I can only control how I react to them.
Thank you for sharing.
Yesterday I was discussing my presentation, but the referee kept interrupting me that I only had five minutes and did not make me finish my presentation, but he kept belittling the value of my research and efforts to the point that I felt... It is substandard research. Those around me kept telling me that this is what happens in all discussions, but those who discussed before me were respected for their work and made to feel that their research was valuable, while I felt that my work was bad and substandard.