Hollow
I feel hollow, numb and empty. I hide and cry a lot when I am alone or when my foster mom is sleeping. .
I'm jealous and envious of the youth, people that seem to enjoy living and are "alive", people with families and friends, etc people in relationships regardless of how the dynamics are, people who have the presence of someone, etc...
I am not aging well, I've never had a good life..nothing but a life full of hurt and trauma ..my internal deep wounds are surfacing more and taking a toll on my physical.
I'm ugly, old, some missing teeth, wrinkles, scars and wounds all over my body, saggy thinner skin, missing thinner hair, scawl lines, mouth pulled almost permanently into a sad clown position, etc .. I have no life, no genuine loved ones, sickly, forever unemployed, etc ...
I am in my 40's and have never looked nor aged youthful ..now it's over .
I really hope that I can find enough distractions to numb me untill It is my time...
@patientLion707
We all definitely wish there was a fountain of youth.
I'm ready to go as well when it's my time. I just don't fear the "end"
🌲
I do not look at birds and think one prettier than the other.
We all have our wounds, our scars, our stories that cannot be told... I could not possibly measure the worth of a life.
Aesthetics are not everything. It can be a burden. Popularity can be costly...
Sometimes, I hesitate to speak with the smiling, for, I have too often found toxicity beneath the mask.
There is joy in wisdom. Does wisdom parade? Sincerity seldom shares company... an honest tear, a joyful laugh, had in solitude, is what makes me feel human.
