The Self-Love Dilemma: 7 Ways To Loosen The Ego’s Grip

Practice mindfulness and cultivate self-awareness.

Self-awareness is an internal guide that lets you know when self-love is needed and the ego must be checked. When you slow down and move mindfully and intentionally during each moment of your day, you cultivate greater awareness of your mind, body, and soul. Take a pause before starting something and inquire about the intention behind it.

Show compassion towards yourself and others.

When you show compassion towards yourself and others, you acknowledge that everyone has a right to practice what they love without judgment. Help others when they’re in need. Celebrate their accomplishments. Also, be kind and forgiving to yourself. When you learn to love yourself, despite your mistakes, the ego has less power over you. See mistakes as opportunities to learn something new and move forward with greater wisdom and understanding.

Let go of judgment and comparison.

The ego loves to compare the self to others. It will imply that something is not worth doing if your performance is not perfect. This is to protect itself from failure or inadequacy. Remind yourself that your journey is not to be compared with that of other people, as you are a unique individual. Celebrate your successes and the successes of others to loosen the ego’s grip of envy.

Question the validity of your thoughts and beliefs.

Your thoughts and beliefs often come from long-ingrained conditioning deep in the subconscious mind. However, these beliefs may no longer serve your best interests. Keep a journal to record these outdated thoughts and your ideas about more valid beliefs. The ego has less control when you can see things from a different perspective.

Challenge yourself to think outside your comfort zone.

The ego is the voice in your head telling you that something’s not possible. It fears failure and disappointment. Feel the fear and step out of your comfort zone anyway. You might surprise yourself or learn something new during the process.

Acknowledge and accept your limits.

Your ego will often tell you that you can’t do something. However, it can also push you to be an overachiever. It may tell you that you have to do it all and please everyone in order to be adequate and successful. Be mindful of when the ego is pushing you too far in this direction and pause to check in with yourself.

Seek outside help and feedback.

You don’t need to feel shame or embarrassment when you ask for help—that’s your ego talking. Learn something new or gain greater insight into your actions by embracing the wealth of knowledge from your friends, family, and associates.

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Reflection:

Would you try these?

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