You can rant here
I know how it feels sometimes when you just want to rant, but don't know who to talk too or even if they will care. Well I care. You're not alone! Please feel free to say whats been on your mind lately, if you want someone to talk too or just want to rant away. I will listen.
@wonderousSigns7
Terrified of not passing all my subjects this semester. Because of my depression and anxiety I've been missing alot. My health doesn't help either.
Is really stressfull.... :(
@Booklover95
School can be very stressful. I understand that. I've fallen behind in my school and I'm rushing to catch up. Stress and anxiety can start to way down on you, but don't let it. You can do this!!!! You will do great! I believe in you 
Know that you are not alone!
Please feel free to message me anytime! Also I would love to hear how everything turns out! You got this
@wonderousSigns7
thank you so much. I'm really trying my very best.
I hope you also make it :)
@Booklover95
As long as you're doing your best, than that is all that counts
Thank you
@Booklover95 Quit trying so fucken hard, give yourself a break it's OK.
@wonderousSigns7 guess what i may be going to drop out of school i have two weeks to take lastsemesters finals. UGGHHH. all of them plus the new finals and doing my homework i have so much abuse and depression going on right now. Just can't take it anymore. HELP!
@Leviathan1234 That soounds like there is alot on your plate rn. But I know you can do it! You're strong enough to get through this! Just believe in yourself and do your best. I know you will do amazing!
@Booklover95 This was exactly how I felt in the months leading up to my diagnosis :( Unfortunately, I failed most of my classes :'(
I can totally relate ♥️. Being in college with Depression is really tough. I have been there. My family has helped me with studies but I am afraid wether on my own would could I have done that?
No rant, just simple statement. I'm done!!!
@EnergySensitive
Done with what?
@wonderousSigns7
F-ing everything. I can't do this anymore.
@EnergySensitive
Would you like to talk about it?
@wonderousSigns7
Not sure if it would help. I'm a burden to everyone. But you can pm me. Not like things could get any worse at this point.
@EnergySensitive
I can't PM you, you would have to PM me.
@wonderousSigns7
Went to your page and there is no option to message you. Besides I'm not a teen.
@EnergySensitive
I'll figure out a way to PM you, if you would still like to talk
@wonderousSigns7
I hit following in you profile. I also have it set so listeners can initiate a conversation. I don't know why you don't have a message button????
@EnergySensitive
I'm trying to figure that out. Because i used my member account to look me up and it showed a message buttone. but idk why it wont show for you. That's weird
@wonderousSigns7
Because I have a black entity that blocks me from getting help.
@EnergySensitive
I dont think thats it
@wonderousSigns7
Believe me, it's real. I've even typed your screen name in browse listeners but nothing came up
@EnergySensitive
Than we can talk right here, or have a seperate forum for us. I'll work on figuring out with the messaging part, and fixing that
@wonderousSigns7
Not here
@EnergySensitive
Than we can talk in another forum if you like?
@wonderousSigns7
Ok see if you can send a follow request for me
@EnergySensitive
Okay
@wonderousSigns7
Nope. When I click on your icon in the posts it takes me to your profile. It says listener but only a follow button.
I'm telling you, it's me!! It's the entity! And no I'm not schizophrenic
@EnergySensitive
Well I'm making a forum just for you and me in the General Entries found in General Support. I should be able to tag you in that forum
(sorry to chime in @wonderousSigns7 and @EnergySensitive , but there's a really simple explanation to this, no black entities or anything, it's just that teens and adults can't PM each other, for safety reasons. That's all 
)
@TaranWanderer
okay thank you
@EnergySensitive i
I have ruined the one thing that mattered the most to me. It is work related and due to my bad management now it is falling apart and it is the most beautiful thing in the world and it doesn't deserve this happening to it, my stupid mistakes. I honestly feel stupid when talking about this because I don't understand at all how it got here, i feel like I'm not on that level, and I was definitely not the right person for the job. I am endangering everyone there and I am so sick because of that. Yesterday was the first time in my life I took tranquilizer medications to calm down because I couldn't leave the house because of how much I was crying. I don't know how I'm going to look at these people's eyes ever again because I'm such a disappointment. I'm so scared of how this will impact my future. I have the option to stay for 4 more months here until the end of my term, to help fix things, but I don't know if I could handle it mentally and emotionally, and plus I feel useless now. I am so exhausted from worrying, procrastinating and fucking up. I don't know how to fix this. I have never given up on anything in my life but now I don't see what good contribution I can make if I stay.
@ineedablanket
I'm so sorry you are going through that. Have you tried talking to others about it? They could help you alot. It sounds like a tough choice you are dealing with, but I know you will be able to make the right one. I hope everything turns out well for you. Feel free to PM me
I'm leaving for an annual mission trip in a week and I can't wait, but someone I used to be friends with is also going to be there. We were very close until I chose to end our friendship because she was toxic and constantly jealous. I couldn't spend time with others without judgment and it was overwhelming.
I'm going to be spending a week in close quarters with her, and I'm planning on respectfully keeping my distance without ignoring her, but I'm expecting her to be rude and judgmental. It might go well, but it's just added stress that I don't need. She's incredibly negative and I'll be spending a good chunk of time with her. This is a social anxiety nightmare, and I'm trying not to freak out too much.
@IndigoRoses
That's tough. I'm sorry you had to end your friendship, but it's her own fault if she is judgemental. You did the right thing since she was being toxic, and if she cant see that, I wouldnt worry about it. If she starts to bother you alot, maybe just take a deep breath and walk away from her. Sometimes silence is the best thing. I hope it all goes well.
@IndigoRoses Sweetheart, remember that she has no effect on you and you have no responsibility to be cordial at all to her, So just go start by telling her to go fuck herself, OK?
Problem solved.
Im having a rough time atm, my depressed is getting worse and i have very little support. My partner is more concerned about himself and what he's not getting. Ive been in bed all day today after yet another argument last night. Im soooooo over everything
@sensiblePeach5689
I'm sorry to hear that. Depression can be a very hard thing to go through. I understand that because I have depression also. There are peopne on here who would want to help you. I'm sorry your partner isnt really helping, they might not know how to handle it. I hope things start getting better for you
@wonderousSigns7 thank you for your kind words. I hope all is well with you 😊
@sensiblePeach5689
of course! And thank you
I'm worthless garbage and I hate myself.
@tluper6491
You're not worthless. So many times I've told myself that, but in the end, it isn't true. Everybody is worth everything. and so are you!
@wonderousSigns7 I am worthless. I'm a crippled unemployable unlovable failure with nothing to offer anybody. I'm not good at anything, I'm not good looking, smart, funny or interesting. I can't work or drive because of my disability and online dating told me that nobody cares if you don't at least have a job, so I'm also going to die alone. I'm literally useless. I have no purpose on this planet whatsoever.
@tluper6491
Don't ever believe what an online dating site tells you. They don't know you! You're amazing just the way you are, and one day, you will find the love of your life. Don't give up hope because some dating site says too. You're strong and a wonderful person.
@wonderousSigns7 That was more the final straw that showed me how hopeless I really was. I have no other way to meet people, I can't drive or work, I have no in-person friends, I live in a boring farm town where I have no idea what there is to do that would interest me. My mom thinks I should join an acting group, but even that I can't do because of my disability and chronic pain issues which would make it very hard to move around on a stage. I can't even bend at my knees without my legs buckling and collapsing. I'm useless. The only choice I have, really, is finding someone online, and that won't happen because people lose interest the second they find out you're disabled or unemployed, even if the latter is because of the former. And I understand it, I get it, nobody wants that burden in their life. Nobody wants to have to take care of an invalid when they have their own problems. So I get it, I don't blame them at all. The problem is me, not them. So I'm pretty much going to be alone forever and thinking for even a second that there could be someone out there for me is just setting myself up for more heartbreak and rejection. There's always a better option out there, someone smarter, funnier, better looking. Someone gainfully employed or not crippled. Someone who isn't a weirdo freak like me. It's not going to happen for me and I need to learn to accept it because I'm just getting worse and worse mentally from the loneliness and isolation.
@tluper6491 i am not crippled like you, but still i am alone and lonely. i drove away from me the love of my life. being alone depends on so many factors. socially i have a healthy mind. but when i look at me, i find a failed lonely person despite having no mental issues. so, you being alone and lonely has to do with lot of other factors. yes, employment is a stressful event. people spend lot of time generating skills for their dream employment. i suggest you try to match your skill with some employment. try working on those skills. and medications.
@RainMann I don't have any skills, that's one of the problems. I'm not good at anything, much less anything I could make a living doing. No matter how hard I try or how much I practice, even for years, I still suck at everything. It's like I'm genetically programmed to be totally incompetent.
@tluper6491 i was thinking about what you wrote. i am really sorry i have no reply for you. it is really a sad state. but i request you to keep trying to find one skill that will make you at least create your own employment or lets you earn money without taking a formal job. i am sure you must be good at something.
@RainMann The only thing I'm close to good at is that I'm kind of creative, and making money as an artist is very unreliable. But even that I have no real talent in and I've lost all my passion for it.
@tluper6491 keep thinking. keep thinking. try to come up with a list of skills.
@RainMann
I still haven't been able to think of any. I'm sorry it's been a long time.
@tluper6491 hey, its okay. you need not be sorry for anything. i suggest keep thinking, take your time.
@tluper6491 Hey, so I know it has been a long time since you posted this, but I wanted you to know that your story really captured my attention. I can see, from what you have written here, that you are quite intelligent, you construct sentences very well and you have a great vocabulary. You would make a great editor or writer in my opinion. Hell, people love and appreciate nicely worded, informative reviews too! There is a lot you could do with your writing skill! I hope that since this post, things have gotten much better for you.
@23Q
Thank you, I really do appreciate that. I don't know how you came to that conclusion to be honest but I do appreciate the compliment. I didn't even finish 10th grade and I struggle with basic math. I screw up everything I do and my handwriting is worse than a kindergartner's. My memory is awful and I'm sloppy, lazy, spacey and scatterbrained. I'm an idiot across the board. I have tried writing before and I'm really not good at it. These messages are usually rehearsed and reread multiple times before posting. The only reason I seem like I write well is because I'm too embarrassed not to. I'm too constantly worried people are reading my posts and thinking the worst of me. In person I'm a stammering nervous moron who can't make eye contact with people or convey what I mean to say clearly. I always say the wrong thing and humiliate myself in nearly every social encounter. So while I honestly really do appreciate the compliment and I'm flattered you think that it just isn't true. I'm also really not a very good critic because I hate myself and feel guilty about criticizing anything without immediately turning it on myself. I used to be really into old movies of all kinds but who the hell am I to say what makes a good movie? Taste is entirely subjective. You can hate my favorite movie and I can hate your favorite movie and neither of us are right or wrong, we just have different taste. Like even if I don't like something that doesn't mean somebody else won't and that the artist didn't pour their heart into it. I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings or discourage them in any way. I'm very private and protective about things I do like because people are very critical about who you are as a person based on your taste in movies, music, books, etc. You like this, therefore you must be that. So it's something I just don't talk about until I'm comfortable with someone. When I criticize anything I also immediately feel like I have to criticize myself and that just makes things worse for me.
@tluper6491
hey, I'm not sure just how old this is but your comment really intrigued me (not like it's particularly a good feeling what you're describing but just the way you say it, well write it) and the whole point of this is that people will. Not. Judge! I've known that you existed for, what? A minute or two? And I already believe that you're capable of great things, just haven't had that take off just yet. It sounds so cliché and dumb and I'd never normally say it but after the day I've had I think I'm stuck in this weird hopeful mindset. You seem to overthink a hell of a lot (me too, man, it suck, right?) and you also seem aware of this, so whenever you have a bad thought, just think "I tend to overthink, so this may not be true." Hitler found love, right? He fucking SUCKS but still found love. You seem pretty cool, so I believe in you.
don't know if this helped or if you're even still alive, but hope it didn't worsen anything at least.
love and hugs, lime
@tluper6491
I understand what you're thinking. And I get that you don't want to set yourself up for a let down. But just because you have a disability, doesn't mean someone won't love you. Nick Vujicic, a man who has no legs and no arms. I'm sure he figured he would never be loved by someone. But he is now married and has children. There is hope, and there is someone out there for you.
@wonderousSigns7 He probably has a great personality, an upbeat attitude, he might be funny or smart, all of the above, there are a lot of reasons he can be loved. And I know lots of disabled people find someone to love them. The thing is I'm disabled and my personality is awful. I'm weird and stupid with interests nobody else cares about. I'm just not lovable. I don't even like myself, much less love myself. I wish I could completely change every single aspect about my personality. The idea of someone loving me outside of my family is alien to me. I just can't see it being possible.
@tluper6491
If you change who you are, than you're just like someone else. You won't be special. I know its hard for you to see someone loving you, but there's someone
@wonderousSigns7 Being special has gotten me nowhere in life. I'd rather be like someone else if it meant I wouldn't die alone. I get what you're saying, but the things that make me special are the exact same things that are going to cause me to die unloved. I'd rather have a bland cookie-cutter factory line personality that people actually like and relate to than my weird bizarre personality and life circumstances that nobody could possibly appreciate if even I hate myself. I can't work or drive due to my disability and I live in a boring farm town where there's nothing to do within walking distance besides a few bars, and I can't even drink because of my stupid medication, and I can't stop taking the stupid medication or I'll get super depressed and try to kill myself. So I'm pretty much screwed. It's impossible for me to meet anybody who would be even remotely interested in talking to me for 30 seconds, much less actually loving me. My parents say when we're in public they've noticed women checking me out before, and I myself may have even noticed it at least twice (and it seems like gay/bisexual men like me as well, which is awesome). You'd think that'd give me hope, but that just means I'm not totally physically repulsive. That doesn't change my awful freakish personality and bizarre interests, or my physical disability and not being able to work or drive, with it also being an invisible disability so it doesn't actually even count to most people.
@tluper6491
I'm sorry there's nothing much I can do. But I will be praying things start to get better really soon for you
@wonderousSigns7 Thank you, I appreciate that. I'm not religious myself but I absolutely appreciate the prayers and any positive support of any kind. It really does mean a lot to me. As you can probably tell, I'm not generally someone who expects people to care about them, so any support is much appreciated.
@tluper6491
I'm glad to be able to help in anyway I can. I just wish I could do more
@tluper6491 hey, its okay, take your time. i am around here. you know what Tluper, i am supposed to study well for my exam, but i am not doing it. i am not focusing well. i am letting thoughts of Sonia haunt me. i must focus on studies. i know she is not coming back and i know i have to live with this pain for the rest of my life. yet, this understanding is not helping me focus well on my studies. i just thought i should share with you, nothing serious. you need not reply to this. just try to type the list again and post it here. i would like to see the list. keep up your efforts.
@tluper6491 you should join that acting group! You never know who your going to find. I can relate to your situation too. Maybe instead try finding friends online? Like maybe gaming or something like club penguin. You dont have to find and be with someone to be happy and its much easier said than done. Maybe find someone with similar interests and make more friends!! sorry im not the best at advice.
@tluper6491 i guess i have replied to you in some other post. please read it.
@RainMann I actually did type up a long response to that (the "crazy" thing) but a Firefox addon I use deleted the cookies while I was signed in and when I hit "Add Post" it signed me out, so the post was lost. After that I was frustrated and just left the computer. Now I'm paranoid and copy all my posts so it doesn't happen again. I'm sorry I haven't responded yet, I promise I will.
@wonderousSigns7
Im sad today.
@wrongsizedshoe
I'm sorry. Anything you want to talk about?
Well, I'm having some serious worries about my new relationship. I've been to a lot of places on the internet to soothe myself but it's not helping all that much. I'm working myself up to worry about things that I really don't need to. I'm worried I'm boring, acting too clingy, acting too distant, confused as to whether It's serious to him or not. He's told me all these sweet things, and he makes such an effort to come and see me but my thoughts are getting the better of me. I'm cautious about talking to him about all these problems in case it scares him off or makes him feel like his efforts at showing me he cares are going right out the window, but maybe not being honest is pushing me away emotionally. I really just don't know what to do and I've cried too much over, probably, nothing. I really don't want to screw it up because I just like him way too much.
@affectionateNectarine9031
That is really tough. But I kinda understand what you are going through, I like a guy and alot of times I worry about some of the samethings you do, but I realized that not talking about it to him would just make things worse. In the end, talking to him, helped alot. When you're in a relationship and you're having unsure feelings, it's better to talk to him than keeping them inside because it starts to change you. I'm sure he will want to listen to you and will understand. I hope everything turns out good!
@wonderousSigns7
I cant sleep): its been going on for the past 6 months or so. Theres been times where it goes on for 2 weeks straight. Its like one day i can sleep and then the next 3 i cant. I dont know why, im so frustrated ):
@Vfninja
I understand that. There's been times where I can't sleep at all. I've started to learn that if i worry about something, or think about things I might've done in the past, it keeps me up at night. Do you think something like that might be the reason?
If it’s anything to you, I have narcolepsy and some days it absolutely consumes me. I know that’s the total opposite issue but I promise… excessive constant sleepiness is horrible. It’s a constant battle and some days I wish I could be more like you. Shall we trade every other month? Get the best of both worlds? 😃 I hope you figure out what’s going on and things work out for you. Hope this at least gave you a smile.
@wonderousSigns7
So, it all started when my parents were fighting. They fight a lot, and it's gotten horrendous. But never this. I thought they were going to split up. So, I went to my room, shut the door, turned on twenty one pilots, then started crying. I texted my boyfriend, Logan, telling him I needed him, loved him, and missed him (I hadn't seen him in about a week.) He responded by, "I'm sorry about your parents. But since I haven't seen you in awhile, my feelings for you have just gone away."
That made me feel atrocious. I wanted comfort, and he pushed me away. I'm sure to him, I'm just another girl. I thought, "If you really truly loved me, your feelings for me wouldn't just go away after a week." I haven't seen my grandfather in 6 years (He went...somewhere. I'm just gonna say that) and I still love him.
Now, because of these things, I have become even more depressed. My grades at school have dropped. I'm usually an A student. I am bullied at school, and usually I can ignore her, but I couldn't anymore.
God help me ;c
@Alberts
I am so sorry to hear that. That's terrible. Just know though, that you are loved and I care about you. It's a tough sitution you're going through. But this is a safe place for you to talk, and find people who care about you. I pray everything will get better soon.
@wonderousSigns7
Thank you so much. That's amazingly sweet.
@Alberts
I'm glad to be able to help