How to support someone struggling with PTSD
It can be a really difficult task in a relationship/friendship if your friend or partner is currently struggeling with PTSD. You may find yourself being unsure about how to comfort them or how to be there for them best in this time.
I have summarized some tips for helping your friend/significant other live their life with PTSD. However, the impacts of PTSD can be different for everyone so you may find some tips more helpful than other
Also, It is important to know that their recovery journey will have its up and downs and that the healing is not linear for your partner/friend. The goal is not to fix them, but to support them on their recovery journey.
Educate yourself
First of all, educating yourself about PTSD and its impacts can may help you understand their behavior and empathize with them better. Living with PTSD can have many impacts on your mind, body and soul. The more you know about the symptoms, effects etc., the better equipped youll be to help your loved one, understand what they are going through, and keep things in perspective.
Here is a good internet post about what is PTSD and its impacts and such: click me!
Be there for them and listen
people with PTSD can have big difficulties with speaking about their feelings and their traumatic experience. Sometimes, talking about it can even make them feel worse. You can let them know that you are willing to listen to them anytime, or also just be there in silence for them if they just want to casually hangout and not be alone. Please do not pressure them to open up to you about their experience: give them time as they may feel scared opening up or are scared of your reaction. In that case you can tell them that you do not pressure them to open up, but that you deeply care about them and are there for them anytime if they want to talk. This could make your partner feel a lot more comfortable and safe.
A person living with PTSD may wants to talk about the traumatic event many times over and over again - please let them repeat their story if they want to! This can be very beneficial for their healing process.
If a person with PTSD openes up to you about their traumatic experience, it is understandable to be shocked about the event. But it is important to respect their feelings and reactions and past decisions. If they get the feeling that you are just shocked and come across as disapproving, they may do not feel comfortable opening up towards you again near the future. Please do not blame them, minimize the experience, make them feel weak or tell them it could have been worse - it can always be worse. There will always be one person in the world who has it worse. But that person is not the only one allowed to be upset about it. Their emotions are not any less valid.
Though, PTSD does not define them. As a friend/partner, you may still do normal things with them as you did before. Encourage them to leave the house sometimes for a walk or meet with friends, or go eat something! You are still friends/partners and they need a normal friendship/relationship maybe a lot in their chaos of emotions sometimes.
PTSD: Triggers and Flashbacks
"A trigger is anything—a person, place, thing, or situation—that reminds your loved one of the trauma and sets off a PTSD symptom, such as a flashback. Sometimes, triggers are obvious. For example, a military veteran might be triggered by seeing his combat buddies or by the loud noises that sound like gunfire. Others may take some time to identify and understand, such as hearing a song that was playing when the traumatic event happened, for example, so now that song or even others in the same musical genre are triggers. Similarly, triggers dont have to be external. Internal feelings and sensations can also trigger PTSD symptoms." - via helpguide.org
Experiencing flashbacks and getting triggered can play a big part in someone who is struggeling with PTSD s life. It can be really helpful for them to have someone they can go to if they feel triggered.
You may talk to your loved one/friend about their triggers, what they are, and if they have any coping methods yet. If your friend/partner is experiencing a flashback, grounding and breathing exercises can really help. You can find more information about how to support someone with a flashback here: click me!
You may ask if a hug or any sort of touch is rather comforting or making it worse before taking action on it.
Offer them professional support
If you see that the PTSD of your partner/friend tends to get worse or does not get any better, you can also encourage them to seek professional help, such as therapy. If they happen to try out therapy, they may be able to talk through their emotions and learn some coping methods (grounding, meditation etc.) You can also suggest them to seek professional support together if you being around makes them feel more comfortable.
However, if your Friend/partner does not want to seek professional help (whatever the reason may be) it is definitely important to also not pressure them here. They decide what they feel comfortable with and what not.
Of course, it is also incredibly important to take care of yourself too. Take care of your physical needs, make time for your own life and be realistic of what you are capable of giving.
These are the main points I have summarized. Living with PTSD can be different for anyone and have different symptoms. Maybe your partner/friend has some other coping methods or wants you to support them differently, what is absolutely okay. And it can take time finding out what fits your friend/partner best, and it may not work out right away.
Love, Avery
@AveryLove
This is such an amazing post, Avery! I spent hours on end on the internet trying to find how I can help a friend who has PTSD and trust me your post simplified all of it and is even easier to go through. I was really upset when I first learned about it, I felt like even though I did understand, I cannot really understand(?) I was really proud of them when they first opened up to me and as they shared it, I was heartbroken to hear how they have been broken over and over again. It was a hard time for me and I wanted to take away all the pain that they have gone through and still going through. I just wanted to make things easier for them, but it was hard accepting the fact that it is not me who can help them, but themselves with preferably a professional's help.
"The goal is not to fix them, but to support them on their recovery journey." - I did not understand it at first because I was so hurt and just wanted things to change, to get better for them. Now, I am learning that I only have to support them, and that is enough.
I spent hours on the internet trying to learn more about this, kept looking for different coping methods and kept sharing with them. It somehow seemed like they have tried it all. I also never forced them to tell their story. I kept saying "I am here if you want to, anytime." The day they did share was both a nice and tragic thing. Nice because they trust me to share something that has traumatised them and tragic because I was so hurt as I was listening to it through.
Thank you for making this concise post about PTSD and how to support a friend with it. It has really helped me to see it a little differently. Thank you Avery 💙
@Moana22 hey ria! thank you so much for your positive feedback.
i am really glad that you find these informations helpful and it sounds like you are really incredibly supportive towards your friend and care a lot about them. I understand it can be difficult to understand PTSD if we have not experienced it ourselves, but as you said, supporting them can really help them so much! and that is very kind of you that they have a place to go to when they want to talk, i am sure that means a lot to them 
@AveryLove Thank you for this guide. I hope that I can learn how to better support my friend. He does not want professional help.