Preventing and Overcoming 7cups Addiction

@Fristo

@fristo .. thanks for starting this thread. I feel its very important topic for all listeners

I will start my reply with self-rating

If we all have to rate our addiction to 7cups on a scale of 1-10, where 1 being least addicted & 10 being most addicted, what will be your self-rating??

I will give myself 4/10 … I still would like to go to 3 or maybe 2.

Now, I will try to share my perspective on this topic

I feel, 7cups addiction can be of few different types: member addiction, badge addiction or mix of two.

Member addiction:

Getting too involved with one or all members. Here, we some time overdo our role as listener & try to be there for member/ members at all times & we sort of take responsibility for them. But I feel, more frequently we talk to any member, we can actually make them more dependent on us or on 7cups. And member start coming back to us for even very small concerns & they expect our validation for almost all things happening in their life. And after a point that becomes overwhelming for us but by that time the member can be too dependent on us.

How to work on this: I feel, we can try to tell ourselves, that we are here to give some hope or positivity to our members & we can not solve each & every problem for our members. Successful listener can help making members self-reliant & encourage members to make offline healthy connections. So, maybe we can avoid talking to one member frequently (this is subjective, I talk to members frequently almost all days to start with & then eventually I will try to phase my chats to maybe once weekly or less) & Encourage members for taking up some healthy offline activities.

Badge addiction:

Getting attracted to leadership roles & want to achieve all possible roles in shortest possible time. Here some also get addicted to the authority part of these roles & then can hurt or discourage lot of listeners in the process if the authority is being misused.

How to work on this: I feel, juts like a corporate world, we have to do our best for each role before we are promoted to the different role or bigger responsibility. Similarly, we can try to take one role at a time, try to give it our best & learn from that role & then eventually we can take up more roles gradually. Because till the time we don’t spend some time with any role, we don’t really understand how much time & efforts that roles need. Taking too many roles at a time along with the offline things we have to do, can be too much to cope with & we will find ourselves on 7cups all the time.

Why at all we need to control our 7cup addiction:

We all love 7cups & we are here for a reason. If we get over addicted, we may have to leave 7cups altogether as a solution (and I have seen many such listeners who have left 7cups). So, if we have to stay here long term & help our community grow & help lot of members, then controlling this addiction can help us contribute here for long time.

I'd rate my "addiction to 7cups" as a 1. I even said to one of the other listeners just yesterday that if I get into trouble for helping out the way I want to help, I'll just leave. I've spent enough time fighting people to try to get them to let me help, I'm not doing it any more. In fact, if I hadn't been able to make my own system for 7cups, I wouldn't put up with how poorly implemented/buggy it is. :)

I was watching an interview yesterday with someone who was part of an MLM (Multi-Level Marketing) company and some of the points they raised to how they got trapped in that also apply here. If you don't have a community, 7cups provides a great one. There are so many nice people who its just nice to spend time with. Also, because everyone here is likely experiencing some kind of issue in their own life, there is a lot of patience, support and understanding offered.

7cups also provides a way to "achieve" things, like roles and badges. That can be addicting in the same way games are ("just 10 more hearts and I get the next Listener level!").

I do think it's worth noting that 7cups itself has some elements that contribute to this problem.
No-one likes to lose things they've put effort and time into achieving, so 7cups taking badges/roles off you for not meeting a quota forces you to be on the site, even if you should take a break. This is even worse for things that aren't necessarily in your control to meet (for example, if you have to host 2 events per month, but there are no event slots left for you to host..).

Making friends here also actually contributes to this problem a lot too because that traps you here, as we aren't supposed to contact each other off-site. In that way, if you establish a circle of friends here, 7cups gives you the ultimatum: Stay here or lose your friends. Eep!

@Fristo

If we all have to rate our addiction to 7cups on a scale of 1-10, where 1 being least addicted & 10 being most addicted, what will be your self-rating?: I would say that on a scale of 1-10, I am a 5

What is your understanding of 7cups Addiction and how can we prevent it from happening? How can one overcome if it is already happening?. 7cups addiction can stem from no purpose in life and a continuous need to separate from issues. We can prevent it by having some purpose in life (I am on Cups for volunteer experience). I would recommend some other forms of getting over life's problems like going for exercise, reading etc

@Fristo

Such an important topic! Thanks for bringing it up.

I think it's important to understand what addiction is first.

Definition

"Addiction is a compulsive, chronic, physiological or psychological need for a habit-forming substance, behavior, or activity having harmful physical, psychological, or social effects and typically causing well-defined symptoms (such as anxiety, irritability, tremors, or nausea) upon withdrawal or abstinence". (Merriam-Webster dictionary).

7 cups addiction is similar to social media addiction.

Addictive social media use will look much like any other substance use disorder and may include mood modification (i.e., engagement in social media leads to a favorable change in emotional states), salience (i.e., behavioral, cognitive, and emotional preoccupation with social media), tolerance (i.e., ever-increasing use of social media over time), withdrawal symptoms (i.e., experiencing unpleasant physical and emotional symptoms when social media use is restricted or stopped), conflict (i.e., interpersonal problems ensue because of social media usage), and relapse (i.e., addicted individuals quickly revert back to their excessive social media usage after an abstinence period).

Recognizing A Social Media Addiction

Although many people habitually use social media, very few are genuinely addicted. To determine if you are at risk of developing an addiction to social media, answer these 6 questions:

Do you spend a lot of time thinking about social media or planning to use social media?

Do you feel urges to use social media more and more?

Do you use social media to forget about personal problems?

Do you often try to reduce use of social media without success?

Do you become restless or troubled if unable to use social media?

Do you use social media so much that it has had a negative impact on their job or studies?

A “yes” to more than 3 of these questions may indicate the presence of a social media addiction.

Reference: Addiction Center: Your guide for addiction and recovery. https://www.addictioncenter.com/

This is such a wonderful topic!

For me, I would probably say my addiction level is a two.

I came here originally as a member. I was in a very desperate and vulnerable position. Talking to others on 7 cups definitely helped because I had no one else to talk to.

Desperation and finally being heard causes two extremes to be realized. You are in a very low position and suddenly when you are listened to it can feel like a high, in a way.

I think understanding what happens in our bodies when we experience anything good or bad is one of the best ways to prevent addiction.

A weight is lifted and can feel so good. For me, after being listened to, I wanted to pass that good on and become a listener.

I think, one way to avoid becoming addicted to 7 cups is to become familiar with other perspectives. For example, if you come as a member, pay it forward as a listener, or vice versa. This will give you an idea of how feels to be on the other side.

I think another way to avoid addiction is to have a set time where you contribute to this site. This will help maintain a balance between on line and off line life.

This is the reason I gave myself a rating of 2. While I do most of my volunteer work here in the morning before my house gets moving, I still peek sometimes during the day when I have free time. I try to do some of my internship work throughout the day when various rooms have been opened up.

Another way to avoid addiction is to be good to yourself. If your body needs a break, take one. Say you can’t participate. Say you have to go. Say another listener can help. Say you would feel more comfortable talking to someone else, if you are a member. Assertively respond, even if you will be judged. We all have a responsibility to be kind and compassionate to ourselves, which in turn keep other people around us healthier. We don’t pass on our bad moods, burn out, anything that is not love, kindness, and respect in this way.

If addiction is already happening, we can make adjustments. Something that can help us is taking a long break to get it out of our system. Something else we can do is to substitute time on 7 cups for other behaviors. For example, if you find yourself going on 7 cups right before bed, substitute with yoga, hot tea, a good book ( this is my bedtime routine, yours might be different).

Helping others, and allowing yourself to be helped are both tremendous strengths, but it can also consume us if we are not careful to listen to what we need. I hope this helps.

@Fristo

If we all have to rate our addiction to 7cups on a scale of 1-10, where 1 being least addicted & 10 being most addicted, what will be your self-rating?

I would probably rate myself as a 5 or 6 because I try to divide my time here at 7 Cups and my offline life, and that time definitely changes depending on personal circumstances.

What is your understanding of 7cups Addiction and how can we prevent it from happening? How can one overcome if it is already happening?

7 Cups is certainly a platform that is easy to get addicted to, especially since it is a platform that everyone can rely on to get support. However, there are many users who join 7 Cups as a distraction to avoid conquering their challenges head-on. To prevent this from happening, users can set a time-limit for how long they stay on 7 Cups to ensure that they have time to settle into their offline lives as well. To overcome a 7 Cups addiction, users can slowly wean themselves off 7 Cups, minute by minute, until they leave themselves more time in their offline lives than 7 Cups. For example, a user can cut off 2 minutes each day from 7 Cups to do something that they enjoy. They can do this until they only spend 1 hour per day on 7 Cups and a majority of their day in their offline world. 💜

Thank you @Fristo for this very interesting and important topic.

It is extremely essential to have a life outside of the online world, especially 7 Cups.

7 Cups is for support purposes. This is because many people are in need of support that they don't receive from their personal circle. If some use this site/app for other reasons, it drowns out the people who are actually in need of support.

It's important to remember to be mindful and set boundaries and limits with how much time you spend on 7 Cups and online in general. Also to only reach out for support when it's really needed. When someone develops an over-dependence on anything it can be unhealthy, regardless if it was good to begin with.

@Fristo

What is your understanding of 7cups Addiction and how can we prevent it from happening?

Some ways of preventing 7cups addiction is :

1. spend time offline doing things you like whether it be reading, watching a movies or some type of things to not have you be on the site.

2. remembering that self care is important whether here or offline life.

3. to come on 7cups when it is really in search of finding a listener who can help with something bothering you.

How can one overcome if it is already happening?

1. to limit the time spent here on 7cups.

2. to make a to do list for reasons of why your on 7 cups.

I had a urge to not reply because I am one that seems to always think outside the box. And sometimes this can make my perspective seem purposely confrontational. I appreciate the opportunity to post small amount of my opinions. I do not a free with using the word" addiction" with a support network. In an ideal world, speaking for myself I would not need a virtual support world but reel world when I found this site was not offering me the resources, tools, or leadership or room to examine my life or provide needed therapy for issues that were definite areas of challenge and restrictions to having real happiness in my life. I believe if you come to 7 cups expecting easy remedies or negative reinforcement or escape that hardships of life then it cannot meet that goal for your. For me, it offered insight that I have strengths as well as weaknesses but we can't get through life withiut each other. Learning happens here and in real life but without the trappings of appearances, body language and the other "distractions" of real life, I could feel free with relative anonymity to seek answers to my struggles, support with loss and grief and trauma and not feel so isolated and alone. Because who wants to re-victimize a victim? I am learning to be a resilient survivor but if I deny my trauma, my PTSD, and act like that is behind me and I am past that then I am not being true to myself which is just as wrong for me as distracting myself if I used 7 cups to deal with my issues. I am opposite, I came to 7 cups to learn and grow as a person. If that is an addict then I am addict. Everyone needs a place where they. An experience compassion and acceptance and grow as person in a support enviro meant. Virtually or in real life. Thank for the opportunity to express my viewpoint.@Fristo

@Fristo

These are few of the things that work for me to deal with 7 Cups addiction.. (I think 😛 xD)

1. Accept it that you ARE addicted. :p Tell yourself ‘It’s okay’. 😊 ..and remember not to be too harsh on yourself.
2. Be responsible. Only you can cure yourself of the addiction (if you want to 😛) and no one else can (even if they want to :p).
3. Talk about it as openly as you can. Share.. let it go.. let it flow..!! LSC had been the best platform for me to do that. 😛 Talking about it honestly and openly helps us to understand our own thought process better.
4. (Then Icecream’s post xD :p) Choose things that you enjoy doing in your offline world, set time limit for your screen time (😭😭), be mindful of what activities are benefiting you here on 7 cups; in short, just try to ‘be aware’.
5. Preach 😛 (just like the way I am doing it here right now lol xD) because when you preach, you yourself are getting taught too : p *grins*
6. Fall in love with yourself!! ❤️🙃 (To be able to do all of the above xD) 😊