Self medicating
Hi everyone, I’ve been going through a really rough patch of my life for the last year basically and have been heavily self medicating with THC. I quit for about 4/5 months and was doing really well until I witnessed something very traumatic and I was powerless. I couldn’t help that person as badly as I wanted to. That day I was consumed with the feeling and had gone to see my friend after work. She offered me to hit her pen knowing I was going through a hard time and after that I have not been able to stop scrambling for the cart as soon as I feel like I’m going to have any emotions whatsoever. I just keep numbing myself because I can’t handle having to be conscious for all of this constantly every day. It never ends and it’s always something new. I’m so exhausted but I don’t know how else to cope right now except by running away into the high
@sociableTurtle9080
I’m so sorry you’ve been carrying this heavy weight—what you witnessed, that powerlessness, the endless tide of hard things. It makes total sense to reach for something to numb it all; when emotions feel too big to hold, finding a way to breathe even a little is just survival. Quitting for 4-5 months took so much strength, and slipping back after that trauma? That doesn’t erase that. You’re not failing—you’re trying to get through each day, and that counts. It’s okay to be exhausted, to not have better coping tools right now. You’re doing your best, and that’s more than enough.
