Not Lars
I'm not one for build ups so I'll just get straight into it. When I was 5, I became addicted to pornography. I had snuck into an older sibling's room and found a portable DVD player, which had contained a pornographic film at the time. As soon as I'd opened the player, the screen projected naked bodies. I shut it immediately.
Some things...you just know is forbidden automatically 😂. I knew that I shouldn't have looked, especially since I wasn't supposed to be in the room, but a child's curiosity is so compelling. I resumed the film and watched until I heard footsteps coming up the stairs.
After that, I just couldn't stop. I would search the house up and down looking for naughty films. That ended when I discovered that films that didn't appear to be naughty were as well. I indulged into a long journey of finding sex scenes of any sort in movies I could watch out in the open. When I moved into a room of my own, I discovered Max After Dark and it was over with. I couldn't wait until night. I'd sleep all day just to make sure I had energy enough to stay up.
I was a child when MTV's 16 and Pregnant premiered. I remembered telling myself that I'd never let that happen. So I shoved everything explicit in a box. Told my friends not to speak sexually around me, didn't date at all and have yet to be in a relationship, and I refused masturbation especially.
Find Pt.2 To Continue
My friends called me a nun😂and I went to college. I was only into my 2nd semester when I attended a party that lead to a gang rape. I obviously had higher hopes for my v card removal experience but it happened. So I dropped out after failing to regain a focus/rhythm.
A spree had begun as if something had awakened inside of me. The next few years was a constant pattern of depression and sex. I even begun masturbation and as I suspected, I couldn't help myself. It was sex all the time. I had been diagnosed with ADD after a suggestion from a middle school teacher. I knew it was because of my constant daydreaming. I daydreamed of the porn I had watched the night before. All of the time.
People tend to take nymphomania lightly. It's actually an extremely exhausting suffering. You'll be bashed and deemed a slut or whore. It's a compulsion that can be life threatening as well. Nymphomania has been placed on the scale next to bipolar disorder due to the depression you're able to withdraw from it. Feelings of loneliness because you know you can't stop and no one would accept you. All you can do is hope that someone understands and love you past it.
