My dad used to be a drug addict, but still talks about his love of drugs all the time
This mostly me venting to be honest, I'm not looking for a solution because I don't really think there is one. My dad used to do cocaine in his youth and well up into adult hood. He's had an on and off again relationship with cocaine for about 25 consecutive years. He got my mom into it, my friend's parents, and other friends of his. Obviously this was really damaging to them!! My mom left a long time ago, but today she still is addicted to cocaine and crack cocaine!! I love my dad very much and he has made incredible progress to getting clean in the last 5 years. 5 years ago he had relapsed really bad and it ended up with us being homeless for about a year and it just all around sucked :/ Now, he is clean!! No drugs except what is prescribed to him. However he talks about his past drug usage almost everyday. He talks about them in a good way, saying his experiences made him "fun and adventurous". Me and my sister just cringe and wait for him to stop talking about it. It makes us both really uncomfortable when he talks about how great drugs are and how amazing they felt. And to make matters worse, the pyschiatrist hes seeing prescribed him xanax and klonopin for his anxiety which I know he's taking more than thats prescribed.
He takes more than hes supposed to and he walks around the house high and loopy. He's not in any danger. We're not in any danger, but I still hate it so much. he talks like life isnt worth living if you can't feel high all the time and I told him that we as people aren't meant to feel that level of euphoria all of the time. I told him that its like a trick!! You feel that great in the moment, but then afterwards you fall so downard in depression that its not worth it at all. I just wish he could find a better way to cope.. I started going to therapy and its been amazing! I've learned acutal non maladaptive ways to deal with my negative stuff and I tried telling my dad how great therapy is and that he might like it. He doesn't want to go because he claims that "recounting all my bad stuff to a therapist wont do any good, it all happened in the past! they can't make it go away." but the whole point of therapy is to give you the tools necessary to take care of yourself in the present. jjkldfasdf does anyone have similar issues with parents who did hard drugs but has since come off of them? I never realized till now how much it bothers me that my dad has been high for my entire life
@facingthesun Wow. What an insightful post. <3 It must be hurtful to realize how his addiction has effected you and those you love. <3 Sending you healing and strength! <3
Hugs. I did quite a lot of drugs in my younger days but not since having my children. I do understand the temptation of escape that drugs offer when things are difficult but I think I’m lucky in that I was never addicted to anything. My advice would be to look after yourself first, your Dad is a grown up who will make his own choices but perhaps you could try talking with him? Tell him how you feel and that you need him
@blueKitten5708
Thank you -hugs- Its nice to hear from someone who has experience with doing drugs themselves. I want to move in with my partner at the end of the year, but im worried leaving my dad alone is a bad idea. But you are right, I should take care of myself first. Though, I will try to have a serious conversation with him about it. Its hard when he's so drug positive and really resistant to change, but if he really loves me and my sister he ought listen to our concerns right?
Yes, parents do need to listen to their children.
I wasn't sure I would find anyone here to relate to, since most places support the addict and not their family. What you posted, is basically my life the last 6 years, but with my boyfriend rather than father. He is the father of our 2 girls, and I have a son from my previous relationship. He has been completely "clean" for 2 years. For the first 3 years we were together he was mostly clean, with a relapse around 1 and a half years. He missed the birth of our first daughter. He was arrested the night she was born for driving under the influence. This was after (allegedly) 5 years clean ( 1 and a half years after we met). I was really upset. Fast forward to now. He has been clean 2 years. We moved 1400 miles away to start over. He still talks about his partying days. He talks to his 15 year old daughter as if doing drugs is amazing and fun. We all hate it. He says if he doesn't talk about it when he is craving, then he's afraid he will relapse. While I understand it helps him, he doesn't realize how it hurts us. My son is now 9, and we have a 4 year and 2 year old girls. I don't like them hearing these stories, and thinking it is something they should do.
@RedGigles
thank you for sharing your experiences with this. Its so awful hearing about addictions from the addicts in such a "positive" way.. It feels like they don't understand why its bad? Like, my sister started doing some drugs in her teens because, how could she not after my dad always telling her how great they are!! She didn't do "hard" drugs perse, but she smokes weed and does LSD. She doesn't do that anymore thankfully, but I think its wrong that my dad encourages it so much. I'm sorry you're struggling too. But like my dad, I don't think them talking about it all the time is helpful to anyone in the long run. There has to be a better way to cope with addiciton than just talking about how "great drugs are" all the time. Like, no one would tell an ex cigarette smoker to talk about how amazing cigarettes are everytime they have a craving. That would just reinforce the craving! oh well.. I hope things are different for the both of us and our families in the future!!
Hello, Actually I have family members that uses drugs. My grandmother was on drugs for a long time. It took the pass of my Grandfather for her to rid the habit. I was embarrassed as a child to see her high all time. There are some individuals that uses drug for a long time, because the habit is hard. All you could do is be there for him.
