@TheDarkPassenger91 which kind of addiction?
@kindSpruce2783 I am a Sex addict.. nothing really weird just so overactive with urges that I cannot sleep. I wake up sweating and shaking and get stomach cramps during the day when thinking about it. I am married with a very healthy sex life but her body can only take so much and we have sex every 1-2 days.
@TheDarkPassenger91
Try consulting some therapist.
@TheDarkPassenger91
I can completely understand, however my SO doesnt have a high libido like me so the 2-3 Times a month of intimacy is making me feel like cheating. I love him so much and I dont want to cheat on him and weve talked about being more intimate but his addiction prevents him from being able intimate with me ( hes an alcoholic) .
@SAhelp
May I suggest talking to your lover about being intimate with another? Perhaps you can convey the situation to him. How it causes you distress, how you still love him, and how you still love him even though he can't exactly help. If he understands and consents to you having a sex life with another, it does not have to be cheating. I do not exactly mean you have a romantic relationship with another as well as him, even though you could entertain that, I just mean having someone else you get off with.
@SAhelp
Im sorry to hear that. Its hard for me to manage basic life functions with two times a week.
@SAhelp
Im so sorry to hear that. My spouse as well only wants it 2-3 times a month and it tends to make me feel like its me or my fault she doesnt want me.
I am really struggling with sex. I would not consider myself a sex addict. I do have a very high and active sex drive. After a certain time of night even when at work I do think about my husband and look forward to being intimate. He is a wonderful hardworking man but often does not seem to want sex as much as me. He often pushes me away...my feelings get hurt. I really love him and we are one month into marriage so I fsel like we both should feel the lovey dovies. I was a virgin and he was too until we met and lived together before we were married. I wishe I had waited as I am a Christian but I wanted intimacy with him so much. I want him so much now but he is so very focused on work. I am incredibly grateful for him and highly respect his work....its just I am so hungry for love and sex and genuinely want emotional intimacy with him. I am lookig for counsel about how to manage my emotions and sexual urges in a healthy way so I can be healthy and also content in our marriage.
@courageousBlueberry3621
Yea I know how you feel. I can absolutely relate. I love my SO so much and we want to get married and have a family but as it is now with us trying to deal with our own demons makes it so hard. I could have sex with him all the time but he doesnt want it like me and its frustrating and hard. I really feel you though.
I have been a sex addict since I was 20. It is getting to the point where I have lost track of the amount of sexual partners I have had and am sometimes too ashamed to pray or touch myself. Anyone that has advice, a message from you will be greatly appreciated.
I am a sex addict. Has anyone tried Sexahaloics Annonyums. Or sex addicts annonymus. It is a place to start. Just google them. I can't spell annoymus. Some have local meetings, others have phone meetings.
@stacy46 Ive been going to SAA for several months. Ive found it helps but Ive been avoiding putting the work in to work the steps.
@Fergus18 Fro some reason, I just can't seem to see this as a real problem now. It was earlier in my life.
@stacy46 I have attended SA meetings. I would call myself a lifer. I need the healthy community and I need a weekly safe haven to go where I consistently feel spiritual and find healing.
The key phrase of any 12 step program is that it works if/when I work it.
Glad to hear that you're not feeling this as a problem in your life now. I hope to get there consistently. Had 2 years sobriety but keep relapsing every couple weeks recently. And I ask myself, "am I really working it?" Can't say that I am.
@TheDarkPassenger91 Hey. Welcome.
I need help with sexual addiction too. That's why I'm here.
One of the questions I had to ask myself honestly was, am I willing to do whatever it takes?
I mean, what lengths would I go to in order to truly be free of the madness that consumes me and drives me to lust?
Would I stop hanging out with certain people? Am I willing to trade in my smart phone for a simple flip device? Will I go to a 12 step meeting every week? Will I get a sponsor? Will I throw away all my DVD/Blu Rays that I've used to act out? Will I stop watching "Game of Thrones"? (You can see I am being very specific, but these really were questions I had to ask myself, because I wasn't me when I was trying to get away with something, or to hide and be secretive. It was all very destructive behavior).
Are you ready to change?
@bowserforpresident
Wow, that pretty much hit home. Yeah I am ready to change.
@bowserforpresident
I had read about that telephone SA anonymous and would really be interested in that. Seems convenient with my busy life. Just not sure how to get involved with that.
@TheDarkPassenger91 I'm sorry for the delay.
There are quite a few options for phone meetings with SA, and I thought the best resource I could get you is the flyer that contains the information to all the options.
I found from the SA website (sa.org) the following: https://www.sa.org/docs/phnflyer.pdf
I am pretty sure i am addicted to sex. I am trying to be good, and faithful. I keep having set backs and it is tough to explain to my wife what i am dealing with. I have been caught cheating with both men and woman. I have had sex with many people and sometimes I still have sex even though I am not attracted to them. I watch tons of porn and am constantly trying to get my wife in the mood, she is a 1 time a week type and it is always the same. I feel like our sex life is ok, i love her, but our lack of intimacy makes me start to look for someone else. I am very turned on with my wife nore than anyone else but I keep messing up. I am a horrible man and can't keep hurting her she deserves better than me and I am afraid i have lost her forever.
Struggling somewhat on this one as well, thanks for starting the forum.
I always want sex much more than my wife, so left feeling unfulfilled all the time. Then when we do have sex she is mainly focused on herself pleasures non-active and states afterwards we should do this more often so enjoyable. I have tried talking to her she agrees but nothing changes - hence to be stubborn means i get nothing! I really do enjoy give her passion and a great time but just want more balance.
It may not seem like an addiction - but this leads to myself always thinking and dreaming about more.... than she would ever imagine.
@TheDarkPassenger91
I can definitely relate. I am a sex addict. I'm new here, 45 year old gay man. I too, spend alot of time looming g for hookups. It's like a drug addiction. I will have sex with someone, usually an anonymous hookup, and feel almost a "high" before, during, and a little bit after, but that very soon goes away and guilt kicks in. Before I know it, I'm looking for that next guy to have sex with. I'm a bottom, and this has affected me in many ways. I'm HIV+, Hep B+, HPV+, and while I do work. My job affords me the opportunity to constantly be looking for that next man. Sometimes even hooking up during work, even outdoor and legally risky hookups (parks, etc). I've done it all. Even some drugs (poppers, marijuana,coke, meth),although that's not my preference, I just want the sex and I have never boughtdrugs, just use if a partner has,. I will masturbate about it multiple times a day. Like 3-6 times. Feels great, but then the low afterwards. I have no friends. Just casual guys for sex.