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Feeling Guilty due to potentially being “attracted” go other women

User Profile: amicableCucumber2842
amicableCucumber2842 August 2nd, 2024

Hi and thanks so much for your time.


I'm seeking advice on a dilemma regarding attraction. I'm an 18-year-old male with ADHD, taking methylphenidate, and my partner is a 20-year-old female.


Recently, my partner said she is only attracted to me and views others as she would artwork, including people of her own gender. This caused tension because I mentioned noticing attractive strangers, especially women, in public.


She asked if I feel something when I see these women, and I said yes. She believes this is lust, but I think it's a dopamine rush. I’m curious about others' opinions on whether this is normal attraction or related to my ADHD.


im just feeling very guilty, we have been arguing and im just trying to understand myself. Any input in appreciate


In her eyes there is a difference between being attracted to other people and seeing them as attractive. She doesn’t have any particular feelings towards anyone except me.

1
User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 August 5th, 2024

@amicableCucumber2842

This happens all the time ... I feel it is unreasonable for any partner to ask if their partner notices attractive people out in public ..... no matter what you call it lust or whatever....

Unless you intend to act on it and go ask  someone out this should not be a threat to your GF.   The appreciate like art line is a good one to make it seem she is above looking at others ...i doubt it and if she was out with other friends i bet she notices. 

For some reason some partners  feel the need to assert that once you are with them you must think all others are like minions and look exactly the same..that is not realistic. 

This is about her insecurity  issues not your ADHD.