Trying to accept I have ADHD
For the longest time and even sometimes until now - I have become unwilling to accept that I do have attention span issues. Instead of trying to find ways to help myself, I neglect it and then I wonder why I'm not succeeding academically.
I wish I didn't have ADHD tbh - maybe I did this to myself will all the instant gratification from instant communication with smartphones and technology. I really don't know
I just want to be able to focus on things
@MoonFire28 IDK what Yard3497 meant, but just FYI there are scams and trolls on this site. For me I denied I had ADHD almost my whole life. Diagnosed as a young kid, didn't really do anything about it until my late 20's when I finally started college (don't ignore it). I am aiming for a stem degree and you might find you have to fail a few classes to get there. The school system is not well designed to be honest. I just failed my second semester calculus class, but the same thing happened my first class and I passed it so I know I can do it.
Often when I get stuck on thought or a problem I get up and walk around, get some water. It helps jog my brain. I also focus on breathing/breathing deeply, this helps not only with school but for my mood (also exercise is huge for people with ADHD). I am experimenting with the pomodoro technique and we'll see what happens. Don't give up, it's still very misunderstood in the health field which means they are still making progress on improving our lives. Learn about ADHD on your own and you might generate ideas that help mitigate your issues. It worked for me once I started paying attention to it. Hope that helps.
Once I started paying attention to it sentence popped out at me, lol! ;)
@MoonFire28 change can happen through small bits done repeatedly over time. This is from the book 'Atomic Habits' by James Clear.
Same
I don’t believe a person can give themselves ADHD. I want to be clear about that. But I do agree with you that social media plays a part in taking away our focus. social media can be more addictive if you have ADHD. Here is why… to make money, social media platforms need to have users on their sites as much as possible. So they use design tricks that give you a little burst of dopamine without you even knowing it. Quick movements, flashes, bright colors, things like that. This feeds our ADHD brains even more than neuro-typicals. So we crave more. But every time we get that little zap of dopamine, we get a little more stressed (literally, thats what these chemicals do). Which then steals away the energy we need to focus on things that matter.
I started seeing this in myself after reading Why Zebras don’t get Ulcers by Robert Sapolsky.
i gave up most social media (I don’t do anything with an endless scroll). It was really hard to, because I was literally addicted to it (my brain craved it!) but The improvement to my focus and my mood was immense.
I do still play video games (also addictive) but I mostly limit those to the evening, after work.
@GmaFox I have done a similar step with social media, I set a timer and allow myself 15 minutes per the two sites that I use in the evening to check messages and respond. I have a worked based social media app, that I use at lunch for business networking.
@GmaFox
I agree with the social media, I see my boyfriend who has ADHD sitting in the chair scrolling for hours and hours on social media. He will watch *** videos all day! It drives me crazy. It also drives my crazy when I do that myself. I have not been diagnosed with ADHD but I am pretty sure that I at least have add, so does my boyfriend. I get very irritated with myself when I spend time scrolling through ***, or watching stupid videos. It doesn't bother me if I am on my phone and I am doing something that stimulates my brain. It only bothers me if I am doing something that is my numbing. I'm not saying that it isn't okay to do things that are mine numbing sometimes because everyone needs that sometimes but to spend half of your day, everyday, it's just a waste of good brain cells and a huge waste of time.
@GmaFox Quick movements and stuff would stress me out as I'm autistic.
try To see the miracle side of adhd. We are creative, energetic and sociable people , we also can hyper focus and if you focus on something that brings you forward you will be one of the best in your field
@Birman001 that is a very beautiful way to look at ADHD. I truly believe that having a positive mind is a big help to healing any sort of mental or physical issue
I experienced the same I know some coping strategies message me if you need help
@moonfire28: I was not diagnosed with ADHD until I was 48 years old. There are times I don’t necessarily like it, times when I don’t want to accept it, and times when it makes so much sense. I think it is absolutely normal to have these variations in feelings and others too. My husband does not believe ADHD exists. This has been very difficult. I know address it as how my brain works rather than ADHD, and it seems to be helping a little bit. so I don’t know if framing it differently or looking at it from a different perspective might be helpful.
ADHD is a bit of a trickster. I find I need to put systems in place to help me stay focused, not procrastinate, finish difficult projects and/or help me navigate a world that is set up for a different neurotype (as well as other things). However, I also seek novelty, so these systems never stick very well. I can’t let you know if it will work yet, but I’m trying a rotation of the different things that I have found to work. 🤷
Hang in there! There is a large community of us out here that for one reason or another deal with the same things you do. And the best part is that the community is supportive, non-judgmental, loving, and helpful.
@MayStorm I am having somewhat of the same problem with my boyfriend as you are with your husband. Only in my situation it is rather odd because my boyfriend has ADHD and was clinically diagnosed with it. He tells me that he feels that I have ADD but yet now that I have started to research it myself and I'm starting to agree with him he has been making some comments. Comments such as"I had ADHD before it was even a thing, not like these other people who are using it as an excuse for their behavior". I'm not quite sure what to do when he says things like that, and I'm not even sure if he's meaning to direct them at me or not?
Good luck! We are all here to support you
