Agoraphobic
For the last three years I have develpoed agoraphobia due to a controlling relationship as well as some past trauma. I'm not really looking for advice on that bc I feel anytime I do talk about it people think shame is the answer in order to get better. I just really want someone to just listen to me. I am struggling with almost everything.
I had to dump my therapist bc she was too focused on trauma that was already healed and wasn't listening to me or helping me when I asked on what to do abt my anxiety and panic attacks to help me get outside and do more. I am so desperate to live. I am so desperate to talk to people and get better and everytime I get a new therapist they don't fully listen to me - I understand how getting past your trauma lowers anxiety but what happens when you're over it and your therapists keep trying to say you aren't when you have no active triggers,reations, you know how to slow down and eal with things but they still refuse to help you live a life?
I am pretty sure I have OCD - I am not diganosed but it seems to be the only thing that makes sense and I'm so tired of these four walls being my house. I am so tired of being a burden to my family, I am so tired of hiding and reading books about anxiety and pyschoscience behind it all. I am so tired of being so desperate for hope or faith that something has to happen or that one day I am going to wake up and my brains going to be different.
I don't know what to do. Or how to have hope, I don't have anyone to talk to about this ; so my question is how do you keep going? How do you have blind faith that everything will work out? How do you keep trying everyday when it feels like its not worth it? How do you stay positive when everything feels like its failing?
@modorange07
I'm so sorry you are not getting the support you need.
It sounds very isolating.
But please know , you are not a burden.
You are going through alot.
Come here and vent, be honest, get it off your chest.
Other days, you might want to participate in the light hearted ice breakers for some balance.
There's a support room that is always open where other people might be going through similar.
I hope you find the quiet space and support you need here 💚🤗
I am sorry you are going through so much. I am currently in a similar situation and I think the cause for my anxiety and depression and self isolation is my toxic partner and I am currently working on being financially independent from him so that I can leave. Maybe it's the same thing in your case that it's your partner that is making you feel unwell.
Wishing you the best
@adaptableCar9987 Sorry I just logged back on! I was in a pretty controlling relationship for 3 years! We've been broken up for 9 months now I think????? But I've been in therapy for 6 months? I had known him for 10 years prior to our reltionship so I don't want to think he was purposely controlling but it was to the point where he controlled what I could watch,or what music I could listen to and I'm sure thats some part of it.
That being said I am really sorry to hear about you being in a similar situation, it does get better- where I'm at is kind of like making that leap on having a life??? Thats my own???
It's like I still punish myself bc he's not here, even thoughI've dealt with trauma and I don't shut down or allow people to treat me badly - I'm still partially stuck there yk?
I know what you mean. It takes time to heal. Been feeling a bit better recently I hope you can feel better as well.