Biggest fear

@rationalPerson1783

If someone did say that to you, what do you think would happen?  What might happen if you said, “yes, I can be childish at times, maybe it’s something I need to work on.”

Not many people can go very long without having childish feelings, and many engage in childish behavior from time to time.  

Every human has a child within, who deserves to be accepted and comforted.  Sometimes the child needs to come out and play.  In fact, the child gives the personality balance and resilience.  

Those who complain about the child or deny it, suffer from a rigid and fragile personality, and very often behave more like a child with a fragile ego, than those who thoughtfully accept that part of their nature.  

You don’t have to fit into anyone’s idea of how you “should” be. There’s a quiet power in embracing your own pace and voice. When you give yourself that grace, it becomes easier to let other people’s opinions slip by without hurting you.

And if you ever want to talk through those feelings, I’m here to listen—no judgment, just understanding.

@rationakPerson1783 I feel same... I love being light hearted and having fun when in groups, making others laugh and it makes me feel light about myself. I see anything before it comes and I always try not to take anything personal or to heart but Sometimes it gets over even though my intensions we're pure... people say hurtful things... Judge me for having dual and weird kind of personality I really love spending time and making them lightly mad at me and they know it... I do it intentionally because we have known each other long enough... I don't open up too much about anything of myself and they sometimes see me as weird and say things like "stop being a child" "don't take advantage of ur mental issues" ( I say not to judge if you don't know something fully or I simply apologize always and let them know my intentions was not bad ) I try to keep my clam... but when someone says hurtful things about my m.h or calls me a child or forces me to act mature all the time I get anxious... when someone points out about my m.h and think I'm just doing it for attention and acting fake, but It's just my fun side with them... When this happens I try to be composed and acting chill and not too much hurt but subconsciously get triggered, I'm trying to control this feeling of being triggered but my past just doesn't let's me... if I act all serious all the time in grp chats it's just not me being myself... It feels depressing... I just want to have carefree conversations with close ones... and really wish people would accept me for how I'm or I don't want to be a people pleasure and it makes me feel worst when my friends tell me to tell them everything and judge.

that's why I fear opening up too much about my past with anyone out of fear of being judge... but still I love having fun and spending time there and making some close ones laugh even though my jokes and talks are too repetitive and childish it's just how we have always been... I feel like if I stop being or having this fun side... No one would care for me... I'll just be someone boring to everyone in my friend circle... I hate people wanting me to act all serious and mature... Ik how I'm... I'm not being fake when I have fun and I set boundries and never cross something that might be hurtful to them... I just don't want to be fake which I'm not when I'm having fun... and I really wish people would know, I do it to feel better and am not being not being fake...

I Have a major problem and it creates problems with family. First problem is since really birth have had issues with men. The first one being my so call father who raped my mom and never meeting him it created a hardship on me mentally. Second was my step father who as I feel stole my childhood when he entered the scene when I was 9 and I became his victim of choice to abuse. That caused enough abuse to do me much damage. The abuse with him ended at 21 after he introduced me to my ex and put a pad lock on the door with my ex and I locked in the room. His abuse lasted til I was 31 when I managed to break free after he strangled me. Then something my mom never did but from 31-34 years old she had a different form of abuse in the sense of I would ask her questions About womens issues where she would just say “Don’t be stupid” or Yell out in  medium tone the word “what” she had did the what thing before butit wasnt as frequent as it had became. With all this I became extremerly shy where someone ask me something I didnt want no one to hear my voice so I would whisper in my moms ear where eventually all I needed to do was give her an eye expression and she knew she had to do the talking forr me. Eventually she passed and  I no longer had anyone to do the talking for me but I then got my daughter  to do it till she got tired doing it and told me I needed to do it myself. At first I couldnt do it but then I started but I would only call someone when I knew they either werent home or left the office to  leave a message on their answering machine. Finally I got to where I can call places like a drug store. phone company, hospital or people I know unless  its a guy then other than my son fear consumes me.I also will not open no door or return calls to anyone I do not know unless  its someone from the hospital and occasionally some one from my church. Recently  a call was necessary to be made which initially my daughter did but became furious when I asked her to return a call to the business where she called me incompetent and really believes I am making it up. She does not believe not only have I made steps with the phone as well as made aso much progress when I was in program she does not allow me the chance to show her I am not the person I once was but she critizes me and it seems like she goes out of her way to break my spirit. But with being in program for as many years as I have she hasnt made any success. Now a call has been needed to be made for over a month and there is just something About talking to people especially a male that scares me half to dealth. I can write and email the person but I can not call I have stuttered or upon attempting just asking for the person at the office whice can happen even if its a female. I may know in advance what I want to say but come time to carry it out . I freeze, fear comes in consumes me and will either hang up the phone or rush out the door. Sometimes I have no idea what to say due to fear consuming me. would anyone have any ideas or suggestons on what I can do to overcome this issue. I am litteraly sacared to the point of losing sleep over it.