I am so afraid

i have a lot of problems considering my family, social life, my self-esteem, and my mental health in general.

I feel like I don’t have anyone around me even though I have a lot of acquaintances

I don’t feel safe enough to share my thoughts with them

and now, on top of that, my doctor told me that I might have cancer (I will acknowledge the final diagnosis the next few weeks)

and i am so afraid

ive been trying hard to help myself with all the mental health problems

but now it feels like it didn’t even make sense

I have plans for my life and now I’m not even sure whether I’ll make it to the next year

it seems like bad luck is following me since 2020

so many things have happened and i cannot affect them or change them in any way

i can only change my perception and focus of attention

i know that it might be not that bad

but I am so stuck in my head

I can’t stop all the intrusive thoughts