Very Anxious & Antsy

Hey so I’m new to how this thread posts work but I wanted to say why I’m anxious here. So I am very anxious and antsy because a few days ago my boyfriend told me that he planned to meet up with his ex girlfriend (he dated her like 10 years ago and she was pregnant by him but aborted the pregnancy) I expressed to him that I was uncomfortable that he was going alone to see her and I would prefer if either he brought someone with him or if she brought her boyfriend since my boyfriend and herself claim she has a boyfriend. But my boyfriend told me that by me acting the way I am that I seem jealous and that I don’t seem to trust him….. Well seeing an ex alone that was once pregnant by him yeah I’m gonna be uncomfortable and I get that they recently got back in contact and are recently friends again but I felt like he should’ve listened to my emotions and at least came up with a solution to make me less anxious and afraid that he will gain feelings for her again after he meets up with her. So yeah I’m anxious that he will gain feelings for her again and I just can’t bare to hear from him that he gained feelings for her again romantically. I’m so anxious I wish the meet up with him and her would happen so then maybe when he comes back from meeting with her and he possibly calls me he may tell me if he gained feelings for her again or not and he still only wants to be with me….. But even then I am too afraid to answer his phone call if and when he does meet up with her which is why I was considering him just saying either the word bad and explaining just saying the word bad means he has feelings for her again and good means that he still only wants to be with me…. I’m just very afraid and anxious. It’s hard to cope. Im trying so hard to hide how anxious I am from him but I feel like I might have a panic attack in my sleep when I try to sleep until the meet up is over with because like if he hears me have a panic attack in my sleep and I wake up from it I would be too afraid to tell him the truth…. And I already bought a ticket to see him again next month since he told me 3 times that I should buy the ticket because he wants to see me…. What should I do? Anything I can do to cope or tell him if I end up waking up from a panic attack in my sleep? I don’t wanna be honest with him about it right now but like I don’t wanna lie to him about a panic attack if I have one and he notices…. Please help me with ideas on how to cope and relax. I don’t see my therapist till Wednesday and I just want to be okay and try to survive my anxiety and overwhelming stress. It’s too much for my heart to handle this much anxiety and stress especially about my boyfriend. Who I love so much.