diary update ( rewriten by chatgpt)

I asked chatgpt for help so people can understand my ideas more clearly. 

1. Too many tasks + too much time on the computer
   When I have many tasks and spend too much time on the computer, I fall into a kind of trance. Because of the addiction, I keep looking for more of it to compensate for a lack of affection.

2. Sleep problems
   Lately I’ve been sleeping poorly. My sleep routine is very disrupted and it affects me a lot.

3. Mental overload and disconnection
   When I saturate myself with tasks, my mind feels in a limbo. Even at the gym I notice I’m disconnected from reality, especially due to lack of sleep.

   When I stop drawing at the gym and leave myself some free time, my mind drifts into all kinds of thoughts—
   for example, memories of my brother telling me (regarding my leg situation):
   “I saw you having fun when you played tennis,”
   and I thought: having fun could have damaged my health… so for you it's fun if I hurt myself?

   In general, my mind goes into distrustful thoughts about people.
   Example: thinking that Mariela (my other therapist) made that comment “you think Esmoris’ therapy is useful” because maybe my father said something to her.

   So I go through periods of distrust and neurosis.
   Then I try to reframe things: maybe I’m too much in my head, maybe things don’t have as much meaning as I give them, and sometimes people just talk without thinking.
   In the end, I’m the one who needs to decide what is useful to me and what isn’t.

Main themes I identified

• Computer addiction

• Regulating routines / not overloading my schedule

• Healthy distraction (games), balanced focus time

• Distrust and past “demons” / rebuilding trust

• Social bonds

• Being lost in thoughts vs. being present

• Grounding myself