SO YOU WANT TO TALK PANIC ATTACKS/DISORDER? The Crippling Kind? Here's a story...

TRUE Panic Attacks?! I'm not sure but I have severe panic disorder...crippling. I was getting them daily for years...just the mention of the word 'panic' or 'heart' or 'dead'...even 'uptight' or 'anxiety' would throw me into a SERIOUS panic attack.

At one point a few years ago, I had a series of attacks that lasted the entire weekend (Keep in mind I've worked my way up to over 8mgs of klonopin per day...not so much now).

But I was living at a friend's lake house and sleeping downstairs. Shortly before that, I ended up with a worthless shrink who didn't believe in meds, so too, my klonopin of over 15 years away and put me on worthless Viseril (spelling).

This one attack specifically, began slowly...coming and going...phantom attacks. But soon they turned into pretty bad attacks. When I say pretty bad, I'm sure it's not what you are thinking. I was gasping for air, felt like I was going to die at any moment...would chain smoke, drink, go outside...whatever to try to get my mind off of the attack.

When I stepped outside, it was cloud covered, and suddenly I literally imagined the sky slowly falling and the pressure would end up crushing me. It's hard to describe.

I'm a total burn-out paranoid shut-in anyway, but I would compare it to maybe being under water and can't hold your breath much longer and you begin thinking you will run out of O2.

I had a similar experience with the under water thing when I went snorkling off the Florida Keys. I couldn't just float below sea level to see things and you can't use your nose to breath...just this thin short tube coming out of your mouth; and then having goggles on as well.

Anyway, it was later in the evening and the attack was still lingering. My friend was half kissing the floor and crashed, so I was by myself.

It had been going on at least 7+ hours at that point. But after he passed out, my mind drifted to MAJOR lucidity. All I could think about AND CLEARLY SEE, was my heart pumping...each beat...the arteries, the blood going through it, the heart itself pumping quickly and thinking with each beat (which I could clearly see in my mind) was going to be my last.

I also have physical problems and used a cane then (before being wheelchair bound).

My friend was out of it and I couldn't get that image, that feeling to stop (If you are familiar with that EDGAR ALLEN POE story...The Raven is it? I don't remember) when he was sitting in the room talking to the police and was fixated on the old man's heartbeat whom was buried under the floor which finally got so intense it drove him mad)...that's what it was like.

I, which I later found out had been hours, was pacing around the pool table in the basement literally non stop (and I also imagined the only thing that would keep me going were cigarettes, so for hours I was pacing and chain smoking non stop literally...to the point of exhaustion, but it still wouldn't stop.

It got to be morning and still going, I finally went upstairs, got a big knife from the kitchen, walked into my friend's bedroom, woke him, had the knife to my chest, and screamed I CANNOT TAKE THIS ONE MORE SECOND!

He jumped out of bed, grabbed the knife and drove me to the hospital. I got there and they played their usual waiting game; they put me in a separate room because I also have social/socio phobias) where it was small and I just kept pacing while they were screwing around ( I was still pacing at full speed; I still remember it was 8 long footsteps/strides from one wall to the next...back and forth, sweating...it was all I could do).

A nurse came in and asked me to sit but I couldn't; while pacing, I told the nurse quickly and in a panic that this was a full-blown panic attack and has lasted/I'd been pacing etc. for damn near 11 hours...approx.: and needed a shot, something right away).

She asked another question and I, while pacing SCREAMED 'I need a shot now...' she said she'd be back in a minute.

I was still pacing back and forth, totally exhausted, when this ( I later found out was a shrink/social worker) came in, sat down and started asking me what was going on; 'how do I know it's a panic attack and not a heart attack..' stupid crap; I SCREAMED AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS TO GET THE F$^K OUT DUMB C&@T, I grabbed the table she was sitting next to with her notepad and a bible on it and threw it across the room. Needless to say, she left.

Anyway, a minute later, a nurse came in and gave me a shot, and it stopped in a couple of minutes (some Benzo, I don't remember).

I was finally able to breathe and talk. I explained the situation, and the next thing I knew, they told my friend they were going to admit me in the psych ward (I was there I think 8 days).

There is no moral to the story...I guess no point either. However, when I in there, they put me back on my klonopin and put me on high doses of Prozac and Neurontin with klonopin when having full blown attacks.

I'll tell you, it's been about four years now and I'm still on the Prozac and Neurontin and it was done WONDERS for me! I haven't had a major attack this whole time. Don't even use all of my klonopin monthly...just in bad cases.

I'm not advising anything, but that cocktail they started me on has done wonders for my panic disorder.

So sorry for the long story...I get carried away.

Back to the original question 'How Common Are Panic Attacks?'

I suppose that question is impossible to answer because symptoms vary as well as intensity from person to person.

Good day.