Am i ever going to be happy because i'm me and not pretending to be someone else
Hello Everyone!
I'm sure you've read my last thread on here regarding me not knowing what to do anymore :(. You see before my parents found out about all of this I had this alternate universe in my head that I promised myself that I would fulfill by the end of the year. See I am an aspiring alternative artist and I love performing and I love the idea of being acknowledged as an artist and helping other people as an artist ad the idea of having concerts and performing in front of people and making people feel comforted via my music.
In this alternate universe I had finally gotten adopted and I was finally developing as an artist at the right time of whch I want to grow the career which is by the age of 5 which is next year. In hopes of being is a safe, loving, caring and most importantly supportive environment regardless of my sexuality or career choice. I would have finally gotten my artist requirements and have launched my career via releasing my first EP album at the age of 15 in the May of 2022 hoping to be somewhere I'd like to be this time next year. Achieving my dreams and making people happy with my music and comforting people in my situation and consoling me via my music. Pam Beesly once said "Dreams are good. They get you through the day" and it is also important that we work for them to achieve them.
Well know since Sunday 23 May when my parents found out about everything and what I had planned what they said practically deleted that universe in my head and now I'm afraid I'm going to live the life that I don't want to live under their roof and end up h u r t i n g myself because i'm in a position i don't want to be in you know. Now i'm in doubt of my dreams. Almost as it they are/were completely bizarro and out of this galaxy you know and I don't know what to think anymore because of what happened about them finding out and everything. It's terrible. I have so many questions for myself.
Even though now i know how to deal with them in terms of what my scholl counselor said am i going t keep up with it forever? Am i going to be in the same place forever? Is my EP never going to happen when I want it to? Am i going to be stuck doing the same thing for the rest of my life? Am i going to stay in such a horrible environment up until i'm 20? Am i going to miss my goals when i want them to happen and feel like life isn't worth it anymore? Am i going to h u r t myself at the end of the year like i promised i would if i wasn't where i want to be? Have they completely altered the way that i think? I don't know please help me :(
@Kittieluna hey there .. I hope you are feeling better my dear . In my opinion - cause i went through this before in the same age of yours due to a toxic parent - I'd advise you to focus on your studies in order to change your situation and be in the place you want to be , you seem very smart and i liked the way you spoke about your self, i know that you gonna reach all ypur dreams and do whatever you want ^^ just focus on your studies and study the harder you can and try not to get in troubles with your parents , for the adoption things , well this depends on the law of your country and if your parents accept or refuse this whole thing .
@Izza111
see this is why you sould have read my first threads first because you sound like my dad at the moment and its very disheartening because i'm coming from getting lectured about this