Increasing anxiety, unsure options
Lately, my anxiety has been creeping around more and more often. I moved to a new state with my boyfriend about 9 months ago. I was unemployed for a number of months as a result of this and I accumulated so much debt. On top of that, I have debt from my student loans, my rent, and other expenses. My job pays just enough for me to get by. Literally, Im lucky if I have $30 remaining after paying all of my dues. I am continuously looking for better paying jobs, but it seems this state doesnt have the type of opportunities Im looking for. So, on top of my money worries, I also get so anxious about what to do with my career. How can I grow within my career if the jobs dont pay enough for me to get by? How can I go back to school if I cant afford to step back from my current job? How can I even find the time to go back to school? I just keep racking my brain for answers, but I just keep coming up with more questions! I get to the point where I feel like I cant breathe. It feels like I am constantly on the brink of a panic attack. I feel so exhausted that I dont want to go to work, but I cant afford not to. I vent to my friends so much that I feel like I am overhwelming them.
@Elinbeth I'm sorry to hear you've been dealing with all these thoughts! They indeed sound very triggering and they would make me worried like you too. Thank you for taking the time to post today 
I know that already isn't easy so I would like to congratulate you about that!
It sounds like you're very worried about how you might not progress with your career there and they difficulty of making enough money to get by, I imagine that's very stressing! How are you coping with feeling on the bring of a panic attack constantly? Please know we're here for you, all venting is okay!
@Mel Thank you for taking the time to comment! I appreciate it!
Whenever my anxiety starts to get like this, I tend to try to prepare myself by overloading myself with information. Like, I will apply for dozens of jobs a day and look for cheaper apartments even though my lease isnt up until November. I research certifications and career paths that might help me. I do this in the hopes that I will find answers among my research (which will then alleviate my anxiety), but it doesnt usually help. I spend a lot of time with my cats and I listen to music, but it doesnt really seem like I have a healthy output for these feelings yet. Not having enough money and feeling inadequate in my career is definitely the driving source of my anxiety.
When I was much younger (middle school age), I was diagnosed with panic anxiety. I would frequently get panic attacks and I would solve them by harming myself. Luckily, counseling helped me find healthier coping methods and I no longer harm myself in that way. In college, I used marijuana for my anxiety (it was legal in my former state). I sought counseling again during my senior year of college but stopped when I realized I wasnt prepared to tackle everything she wanted to help me with.
@Elinbeth I'm glad to hear you're not harming yourself as a coping mechanism anymore, finding something that works for you is not easy, and something that works some times might not always work. I tend to take deep breaths, and talking myself out of triggering thoughts usually help, but I know solving some of these thoughts could be a more permanent way to feel better.
Your researches are a good way to try and solve your issues! Money issues do not get solved easily & finding new jobs is surely hard. What would have to appear in these searches for you to feel better? Making small reachable goals is something that has also helped me in times of need, taking small steps upon bigger goals!