Relationship anxiety
On thing Im constantly worried about is my relationship with my long term boyfriend(1 year). We had a rough bump in the road and argued a lot for a while. I would get upset with small things that I see as ridiculous now but I feel like Ive damaged my love for him in some way. I know in my mind I love him very much. I care about him more than anything. But whenever I am alone and have time to think my mind wanders to things such as do I really love him. He is my only close friend so one of my recent thoughts is if I only want to stay withhim because he is the only person I spend time with/ talk to outside of school event. Even though I know I my mind I care about him very much. This all started with a few big arguments leading to exit what Ive learned is the honeymoon stage of our relationship. I dont quite feel butterflies with him anymore although whenever Im close with him I feel safe and secure and I feel like I can tell anything. Ive read that this can actually be ROCD but this feels so real. Most of these thoughts only occur when Im not with him. Sometimes I get the thought of I need a break from him although as soon as Im alone I miss him dearly. I miss being able to talk to him a lot. Im not really sure what is going on with me. Is there a way I can make sense of these emotions and relax my mind? These have been occurring since about July.
I would also like to mention that due to family issues in that past, it took me a long time to trust him at all. Before having these thoughts, if we got in an argument I would have negative feelings about him not actually loving me and thats why he would be upset about something or not do something the way I think a relationship should be. I will note that this is my first committed relationship and his also so we are both still learning. I feel that Ive subconscious convinced myself that those things are true. He is an amazing boyfriend, not perfect but he is patient with me and knows all that these things are going on and is wanting to help me work through them but isnt sure how.
Hi there, and thanks for sharing! I'm sorry to hear of your relationship struggles. It looks like you are quite aware of the causes. Every relationship will have its ups and downs; knowing how to handle the downs is key to a successful relationship. Have you addressed your concerns with your bf? I wish you the best, and feel free to reach out to a listener if you wish to chat.
Hello, thanks for sharing your story! It seems like you are aware of the situation and what's going on. I understand that your boyfriend is your close friend, and that you care about him. What methods have you guys tried to solve problems?