The Journey I'm On

A couple of hours ago I was in an argument. Well, not really. A couple of hours ago someone was yelling at me.

Six months ago I would have completely broken down. I would have cried. I would have gotten so nervous I probably would have thrown up. My heart would be pounding, I would reach for food as comfort, and I would be nervous and shaky for days.

But it's not six months ago. It's now. And for six months I have been praying, and meditating, and being mindful and introspective. I have been learning about my triggers, about how I react, and about what I want out of life for myself as a human being.

And so, being yelled at, I paused. I looked at the situation. I understood that the person yelling at me was - is - miserable. Everything in life is sour, bad, negative. And this yelling, this outburst, is like a small volcanic eruption of all the anger and hate and misery that has been bubbling inside.

And I choose not to react. Not to cry. Not to panic. Because I don't want to be a part of that negative. I'm happy to help someone get out of negativity, but I can't be drawn into it.

I'm giving myself a pat on the back for making progress, taking a stand, and understanding that I can't take on the pains of others to the detriment of my own life and well-being.