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thoughtfulmomma
10,982 M Pacing Forward 5
PathStep 450 Compassion hearts1,071 Forum posts1,217 Forum upvotes1,743 Current upvotes1,743 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2024 Member sinceOctober 11, 2019
Bio

When things are bad, I'm suffering with anxiety issues with a touch of OCD to make it worse.

When things are going great, I love playing games, watching TV and going for hikes in nature.

Recent forum posts
Change = Anxiety
Anxiety Support / by thoughtfulmomma
Last post
2 hours ago
...See more I've been going through a lot of "life" changes the past few years - and change is never my friend.  Change gives me a ton of anxiety, even if it's good change. Lately things are in full-on "change" mode and that means I have been in some serious panic mode.  It just is getting a bit ridiculous and I'm frustrated that I can't seem to move beyond these feelings. Are there some things going wrong? Yes.  Are they dire, terrible, horrible? No.  But, you know how that anxiety brain works.  EVERYTHING is terrible.  I'm exhausted.  Why can't my brain believe that everything is okay?  Because it is.  It's not great, but it's not terrible.  So, come on brain, help me out. I've only been awake a few hours and I'm already exhausted from worry.  The worry that my mind creates. So, I'm trying to breathe.  Trying to make myself believe the truth instead of the lies the brain tells me.
A frustrating thing about anxiety
Anxiety Support / by thoughtfulmomma
Last post
March 14th
...See more It's when the people around you don't really understand anxiety, especially when one of those people is your spouse.  My husband's attitude about my anxiety is that I just need to stop worrying, stop having anxiety. I've said it on here before, and I'll say it again - don't you think that if we could just immediately stop feeling this way we would???  OF COURSE!!!  Sometimes having anxiety is very lonely.
Do you make a self-care plan?
Anxiety Support / by thoughtfulmomma
Last post
January 8th
...See more When talking things over with my therapist about my anxiety issues, we always come back to the subject of self care.  "What are you doing for self care?"  And, like many of us, I have the list of things I do to try and make myself feel better.  Deep breathing, going for walks, meditation, etc. Lately, though, she wants me to focus more on a plan of action that I can take when I'm having a problem.  It's great that I can breathe, or walk or meditate, but I can't always do that when in the middle of an anxiety attack.  I'm trying to, but I just don't know how to pull it all together. If I'm triggered by Problem X and I go into a panic attack, I should do A, B, C and D.  That way, when I know X happens, I will go to my plan, rather than an attack. Does anyone else have a full plan of action for self-care that they do when they're hit with an anxiety trigger?
Fear of the Unknown is driving my anxiety high today
Anxiety Support / by thoughtfulmomma
Last post
January 8th
...See more Today I'm going to have to confront someone about some issues.  Confront really isn't a good word.  I'm not generally confrontational.  But I have to have a talk with someone about something incredibly uncomfortable.  I don't know what they'll say - or if they'll respond at all.  But, I'm just sitting here wondering what will happen - and of course, my brain just goes to "it's all going to be bad." I hate that.  I hate that I can't imaging this conversation going well, even though I want it to.  I listened to a meditation this morning that said to envision a color that makes you happy, that makes you feel positive.  And then take that color and send it forth into your whole day - color your day with that happiness and positive feeling.  Look forward to seeing that color. It was nice to hear, but I'm not really able to do it.  I always used to be so optimistic, but anxiety has stopped me from feeling that way and has turned me very pessimistic and I don't like it.  I don't like how I am now and I'm tired of it.  I just want to be normal old me again, the way I used to be.
I could use some support and guidance
50 & Over Community / by thoughtfulmomma
Last post
January 8th
...See more I'm reaching out to all of the parents of adult children here.  I'm struggling.  A lot.  I'm struggling to live my life as I watch my 21 year old adult "child" live his.  I'm struggling because he doesn't need me as much anymore - but I still need him.  Or I need that relationship we used to have.  I'm struggling because when he's hurting now, he no longer comes to me for help or support.  I'm struggling because I know he's an adult and this is how we learn to become an adult - by venturing out on our own, doing our own things, making our own mistakes, and growing from all of it. I know he loves me, and we've generally got a solid relationship but I'm struggling going from the mom who was there to fix everything to the mom who is on the outside now. Parents, how did you get through this part of letting your child become an adult and live their lives without you knowing everything that was happening, and without you wanting to be involved with everything?
Everything is a Catastrophe!!! (not really)
Anxiety Support / by thoughtfulmomma
Last post
November 24th, 2023
...See more I'm struggling.  And I'm struggling with my struggling.  My anxiety is one of catastrophe.  You know, my brain thinks one thing and within two minutes I have drawn the conclusion that I'm dying, or everyone I know is dying - that kind of thing.  "Catastrophizing" is what I've heard it called.  And I'm AWESOME at it. I'm trying to figure out why I do it.  I know once I finally have that answer my whole life with change.  I understand what's happening from an intellectual standpoint, but I don't know why I personally continue to do it.  It feels terrible, makes me incapable of having any fun, or just living in the moment and having a regular day.  So, why do I keep doing it? This is the journey that I'm on and I'm extra tired today.  I hope I can find the answer soon.
Morning Anixety Part 3
Anxiety Support / by thoughtfulmomma
Last post
September 17th, 2023
...See more Today was "yet another day of waking up and then feeling that rush of dread and anxiety." I came here and did a search on "morning anxiety" and found that this will be my third post about it. And there are plenty more from others. I would like to pull together a list from everyone about what they are doing to help alleviate morning anxiety. I need it, others need it. Waking up in a state of panic each morning is not good mentally or physically. So, when you wake up in the morning, what do you to make yourself feel better? I'd love to pull together some kind of "wake up, self-care" routine. I'm kind of all over the place - breathe, quick meditation, pet the cat, think of things I'm grateful for, think of things that went well the day before. I need help with this! I want to wake up and feel well-rested and relaxed.
When does it get easier?
50 & Over Community / by thoughtfulmomma
Last post
August 17th, 2023
...See more I need to hear from seasoned parents today. How do you let go of worrying about your children? To be specific, your adult children. I can't seem to stop my worry, and it's really causing me a lot of anxiety and is making for a miserable time in my life. There is officially nothing to worry about, but I'm a nervous wreck. If my child isn't around, then I'm pretty much worrying all of the time. Safe? Healthy? Happy? Fed? Supported? Protected? I understand he's an adult - a young one, still in college, but still an adult. And I'm having a very difficult time with adjusting to the fact that he's living his own life on his own schedule and I don't know what's going on. Is it my business to know? No. But the longer I don't hear from him or see him, the more worried I get. Is he capable? Yes. Has he ever done anything foolish or dangerous? No. So, why do I continue this worry? How do I start to grow from this, relax and start enjoying my life and the present moment, rather than obsessively worrying about things that aren't happening?
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