Today is a really bad day

I cried three times just this afternoon. I can't stop negative thoughts. Everything is starting to feel purposeless and I'm trying so hard to battle this feeling of misery. It never happened since now such a severe case of anxiety and I've been struggling with it since 5 or 6 years. The thing that makes it so bad is that I can't do anything. I can't eat, study, talk without crying. I never got to this point. I've been trying to distract my self all afternoon and I don't know what to do anymore. I can't even go to sleep to forget these days because my head is filled with negative thoughts that don't leave me alone since this morning. Since I'm unable to tell anyone in fear of losing them here I am on this platform, hoping to get a sense of relief from this confession