Trying to cope
I'm starting to worry that I'm getting sick. I was at a funeral over the weekend and someone hugged me without a mask on and without permission. It was great catching up with people but I was not thrilled about that part. Yesterday I woke up with congestion and a headache and today the congestion. Last night I woke up to turn over, felt a couple heart palpitations and it brought on a fairly minor panic attack. I just kept focused on my breathing and every time I filled my lungs, I pointed out how nice and full of air they were, how good it felt that it meant I wasn't having "trouble breathing". I'm not sure how long it took, but eventually I calmed and went to sleep. I have a lot of tightness in my Bach and around my ribs but that is pretty common for me. I also checked my temperature yesterday and it was slightly elevated. Not quite fever range but enough to make me worry more. I'm supposed to spend time with my friend who is here for the funeral (it was his dad that passed away) before he leaves the country again. I worry that I should cancel or postpone. I'm going to check my temp again today and we'll see what it says.
@SnappyTurtlegirl
Hey, I know it must be taxing to know that someone was reckless enough to not maintain social distance during the times of current pandemic. However, try not to worry because that would further aggravate your situation. Given the symptoms you have self-diagnosed, I would recommend that you try and follow medical precautions and remedies declared by medical bodies and professionals. That should help fight the symptoms, incase the ailment has cropped.
It is good to be cautious but do not let your worries and fear get the better of you. Worrying won't aid you but taking necessary measures, as required, would. Having done so, if unpleasant thoughts persist, try and divert your mind with things you love to do, or talking with people you're fond of.
I hope your condition has become better by now. But if not, and if you deem fit, consult a medical practitioner of your choice.
The situation with your friend (who's dad passed away) is sad and tricky. You must be conflicted between taking care of your health and comforting the said person. I hope your health condition improves. If it remains, whatever you choose to do (whether to meet the friend or not), I would recommend that you inform the person of your doubts relating to the ailment.
I am hoping for the best. Take proper rest, and feel free to write back incase if you'd like to talk further.
Sincerely,
Aura
@SnappyTurtlegirl The part where you have mentioned how you've come to appreciate trouble-free breathing denotes how bogged down you must be to not be able to breathe freely. It was very brave of you to divert your mind from such troubling thoughts. I would recommend that you keep it up and not let your fears get to you.
Another aspect that I notice is that hard times make us appreciate the good days. So, hold on to this feeling (from a positive perspective) and recollect other things you're grateful for. Note them down if you must but turn to them whenever unpleasant thoughts try to occupy your mind. You're stronger than your mind/thoughts.
Love,
@WhiteAura9 I did postpone with my friend telling him that I wasn't feeling well and that it would be irresponsible of me to be around anyone while feeling sick. He was of course understanding. I talked to my brother last night which helped and since I only take a half tablet of anti anxiety medication, I took a little more than that before bed last night. I feel better rested today, still congested (which could be from anything I know) just taking it one step at a time. I like what you said about feeling my breathing and focusing on what feels good. I've been journaling lately but I haven't thought to do that the last couple of days. I also decided to get this week's groceries delivered as a precaution but also because again, I feel irresponsible going out while sick right now so that will be one less stress. I'm not fully quarantining from my husband and son but I am limiting certain contact like kisses and such. I hope I don't have it but caution seems like a good idea.
@SnappyTurtlegirl
Hey! It must have been a tough call but I'm so proud of you to make such a responsible decision! Not meeting your friend who's dad just passed away must feel bad. But I am proud of you for taking this bigger decision which is in the best interest of not just the two of you, but your respective families, too.
I notice that you are taking things into your own hands (as opposed to being guided by fear) by calling your brother or taking medicines as per the need of the hour. You are being so brave! Are you feeling better than before? Taking one step at a time is indeed the best way to keep worries at bay, and be more in the present. Ofcourse, you may be a bit restless until you fully recover but that would be in healthy proportions - that which would prompt you to take necessary precautions (such as the one where you ordered delivery for groceries or limited contact with family).
I, too, sincerely hope that you get well soon. Rest well until then, and try to remain occupied with light, fun activities or thoughts. 
@WhiteAura9 and I do feel this tension through my chest often. Sometimes it's easy to tell that it's just psychological but sometimes it's not. when I focus on my breathing my breathing is still very good but I don't focus on it it's almost like it exhales and wants to stay that way.
@SnappyTurtlegirl
You have recognised that some of your fears have purely been concocted by the brain, and that things are not necessarily as bad as you perceive/apprehend them to be. That's good progress! That is how you would be able to tell apart rational thoughts from unjustified fears. And you demarcate between these two, you would be better able to entertain selected positive or cautionary thoughts. (As for the rest, merely acknowledge them and then let them go. Denying their presence or forcing them to go will only make them stronger and more daunting).
Focusing on breathing does help to collect thoughts and calm minds. Whenever you feel that incoming train of worrying thoughts, start focused breathing to soothe them away. A lot of breathing/mindfulness exercises are available on 7cups as well as elsewhere online. Do check them out as per your convenience, if you haven't already.
I hope the above response wasn't confusing.
Hugs.....
