Can't make friends because of anxiety
I can't make friends because of anxiery. I got really lonely sometimes, and anytime someone try to talk to me i become very anxious and rub them the wrong way. How can i change
@Prisilia
It helps to change your focus from how you are feeling and how you think they are reacting to you, to the other person and how you can help them feel comfortable. Think about how you would want someone to treat you, and sincerely try to treat others this way. The best way to help yourself is to help other people. People are drawn to sincere, caring people, no matter what they talk about or if they are nervous. So the topic doesn't matter (I almost always resort to the weather - boring but effective!), as long as you are sincere and care about them. People can sense this. Also, try asking questions - that way you'll know what interests them and be able to tailor your conversation. As you learn more about them, you'll feel more comfortable sharing things about yourself, and a real friendship can grow.
@lonelylinguaphile
What you posted is very good advice! 👍
@AbbyHarris1976
Thank you! It means a lot to hear someone say that - I reread it a dozen times wondering if it was good enough to post before hitting the 'add' button. I have been known to overthink and self-doubt a tad too much at times...
@lonelylinguaphile
I double check my work all the time and try to reread my stuff before sending. Sometimes I even check several times to make sure I set my alarm properly to get up for work the next morning. 😂 I work in a clinical lab, so I have a reason for behaving like this. 🤣
@AbbyHarris1976
Haha yes! I jumped out of bed this morning at four-thirty because I was convinced I'd somehow slept through my alarm! Glad to know I'm not the only one! ;D
@lonelylinguaphile
There were a couple of times I had forgot it was the weekend (and I wasn't working it) where I inadvertently set my alarm and then realized later that I don't have to get up so early. 
@AbbyHarris1976
Haha too funny! Gotta love paranoia - sometimes its useful, sometimes not so much... 
@lonelylinguaphile
I work in a lab, so being a little obsessive compulsive is not really a disorder. 😉☺️
One of my coworkers (a senior medical technologist, even, so she outranks me) saw me putting centrifuge balance tubes in order according to fluid volume and (good naturedly) mocked me about being obsessive compulsive and I looked at her like ... really? 🙄 😂🤣 She realized the method to my madness about 2 weeks later when the workload ballooned to ridiculous levels ... on a Saturday morning! 🤣
@AbbyHarris1976
Yay! A victory point for the obsessively methodical bunch!
@lonelylinguaphile I love this! 💓💯 My social anxiety went bad since I started working at headquarters instead of on the sales floor at the boutique, and this is reaaally good advice! Thank you for sharing!