I need help
My anxiety has been getting worse and worse by the day.
I dont know what to do or how to handle it. I am in a constant state of panic and am always on the verge of tears. It gets worse when i have to work in a group or present something to a class in school. I'm always scared of messing up so as a result i procrastinate and avoid school work as long as possible. I mean hey if i dont do it i cant mess up. Im also a perfectionist so everything has to be to my liking or else it isnt good enough
My perfectionism applies most towards my art though. You see i am trying to pursue art as a career but am constantly worried i am not good enough. Even if people say that i can get a career in art no problem or even say stuff like you have a lot of talent and potential i cant believe them. I think that everything i do isnt good enough and i sometime even think that im not even worth it......
Then today in school i was panicking really badly and had no idea how to handle it. So i became a bit self destructive. I didnt use my asthma inhaler and then i ate even if i wasnt hungry because i wanted to be sent back home. I just didnt want tol be there. So i ate and ate hoping to throw up but when it didnt work i tried to force myself to throw up. It still didnt work though. So i was forced to go through the day in a panicked state of mind.
Now everything is hard though. I have no motivation nor energy for anything. I havent even drawn all day and drawing is my only passion and my only escape. I also have homework and a test tomorrow that i havent studied for but i just have no energy.
I just want this to end.
Im tired of living in constant fear.😢
<3 hey wanna talk ?
I don't know if I can do anything to help, but if you let me try I'll do my best! Listen, just by posting this you've taken a huge step forward!! Actually stating that you're suffering and accepting that something needs to change is huge. Talkin to others about it will help too. Keep reaching out for support and you'll find someone to help you! I'm here too if you want to chat. I'm proud of you for openin up and posting this, that's more than I could do at the time haha
when i like someone i try to impress them. i shut myself so that they don't see my faultsand if i do make mistakes , i get embarassed. i can't stop thinking about the incident and comprehend the person's opinion about me. i want to get out of it.i want to be free. whenever i head out my mind starts to tell me that people are ready to see me with huge glasses. i get scared. the worst part is when you can't react to the incident that makes you feel embarassed. i want to stop people's opinion shaking me.
i want to stop it. but i can't.
I'm sorry you have been feeling like this lately. Anxiety can be really tough to conquer. Anxiety isn't you, it may dwell with you, but it isn't you. So punishing yourself for it doesn't help. No matter how miserable you feel it doesn't make it better.
That panicky feeling can be overcome, even if it feels like a wave trying to drown you. And sometimes perfectionism with anxiety creates an inner berating voice lying to us about how worthless we are etc. Don't listen to it.
There's several things you can try. You can try a mantra, listening to your favorite song, or just staring at a beautiful piece of art for a few moments. The key is to let that wave of anxiety wash away after a few moments of focus on something else.
It's ok to not have energy to do something. Some times we have to step back and take care of ourselves. I know that test is important but you are so much more important than any test could ever be.
*hugs*