Learning To Cope Every Day
Hello! I am 27 years of age. I've had anxiety throughout my childhood from as far back as I remember. I've been prescribed different anti-depressant and anti-anxiety medication over the years and just recently stopped taking them. I didn't feel that they worked for me; instead, they made me feel sluggish and sick, and I believe there are other ways that I can practice to gradually overcome this intense anxiety that I'm experiencing every day. I have a story and I'd like to share it, because no one else understands me.
Throughout my school life I was bullied. I don't have great memories of my childhood years. Yeah, my family and I were close, but my parents have consumed alcohol for a very long time, around two-three 3litres bottles of cider per night and still do today.
Anxiety happens often. I feel it on the bus to work, when I'm walking past people that are in groups, when trying to socialize with anyone that I don't know. I work as a housekeeper in a hospital, and my job that consists of ward-based cleaning and socializing completely exhausts me to the point where I find it extremely difficult to survive another two anxiety-filled bus rides home. The symptoms kick in even if I'm walking down a busy road with cars driving past.. Not too many anxious thoughts occur these days, my body just jumps into fight or flight mode automatically. I'm very aware of my surroundings at almost all times.. I'm never in peoples way!
@Allura
Thanks for sharing your story, and it's great that you feel you're learning to cope with your anxiety every day. I guess that's the thing with anxiety. You either beat it, or learn to live with it. Neither are easy I'm sure. But you're getting out there and living your life, in spite of your anxiety, and that's to your great credit. Youre not letting it beat you!
Alcoholism is a family disease, in that it affects all people surrounded by it, and not just the drinkers. Bullying can have a profound effect on self esteem. You've had to put up with the effects of both, so try not to be critical of yourself for any difficulties that's left you with. You sound like you're a fighter, and that attitude may just help you overcome the crippling effects of such anxiety. I really hope you can.
