when people try to give advice on social anxiety
Arghh. I just want to vent for a minute about what I encounter too often when I mention that I have social anxiety. Unfortunately I feel that many people do not understand it as a full mental disorder like bipolar disorder, ptsd, etc. Too often well meaning people say "I had social anxiety when I was younger and I grew out of it" or "I used to be shy like you but then I stopped caring what people think" UGHHHH NO. no. no.
So frustrated with people being so dismissive of my social anxiety Disorder (with a capital D) for which I require psychological and psychiatric treatment, and which I will not just "grow out of".
ARGHHH
-Day
@Daydreamer47 Well said. You speak for many.
@clab aw <3 <3 thank you. that means a lot.
@Daydreamer47 Yes! Yes! Social anxiety disorder and shyness are not same thing. And it hurts when someone uses them as synonyms, so thank you for writing it. Or even invalidate by saying "just go in a bar and talk to people" or "it's just people, how much harm can they do?". No, please don't.
Yes: exposing someone to situations that cause anxiety can help, but not in that movie magic way. It's not like you get in a crowded situation and come out BOOM instantly cured and there's confetti in the air. It's more like you need some tries and maybe some more, while getting support before, during and after. If it was that easy, wouldn't be called a disorder, duh
@Daydreamer47
Like Clab said, you speak for A LOT of us. If you have anxiety that is one thing but actually having a DISORDER is another thing. That's like saying I used to cough before, but now I don't because I took care of myself to an asthmatic patient. I hope you will try to find the people that do understand(because not everyone understands but there are a lot that does, focus on those people in your life)
Best wishes,
Prio.
Indeed. The stigma around social anxiety and comparing it to being shy is one of the main reasons mine is so bad. Almost everyone I tell assume it's just my introverted personality when it is in reality my crippling fear that no one takes seriously. I've met about three or four people that actually believe me when I stress that it's more than shyness.
In conclusion, you are not alone in your frustrations. :)
@AshtheFab. Well said. Can I ask fot your opinion? People thinking am socially confident but actually I have to a super hard. This is due to anxiety making me worry about peoples reactions. So it's kind of social anxiety. But not because I find people stressful. More boring and I worry that I will come across aloof. I've cultivated a sort of goofy persona but it's not me. It's a mask I can hide behind. So is this social anxiety or not? Sorry. I haven't put that well have I.
@pinkOcean1599
It's okay! I think that based on what you said, you could definitely have social anxiety. I can't tell you whether or not you have it for sure because I can't feel what you feel (and I'm not a doctor :P), but you know yourself best. In any case, you're welcome in the anxiety subcommunity. I hope you can find the support and answers you need here in 7 Cups. :-)
@AshtheFab thank you. And OMG you managed to understand my post. So many typos.
@Daydreamer47
I feel this frustration too. Also when people think introvert = shy. Introversion is more about the energy being social takes and it feels taxing after a certain amount of it. Shyness is fearing other people's reactions and fearing how you'll sound from speaking up at all. Extreme extroverts talk too much to bother in most cases to learn these differences. lol