Advice please

I myself am not bipolar but my partner is - never formally diagnosed- every morning he wakes up and the smallest thing sets him off to the point I dread being in the house when he wakes up. These “episodes” last until he smokes weed. So he’s either got bipolar or a dependency on the weed. I’ve suggested therapy and medication but he insists they don’t work and they just send more people loopy. It gets to the point sometimes he punches holes in the walls and furniture. He says all he wants is for me to listen but when he goes on for hours with no end in sight it becomes to sound like white noise to me and I just snap and he goes on for more hours. We have 2 children and I’m afraid they’re going to turn out like him one day. Last night he told me some pretty scary stuff like he was drunk I don’t know if he remembers or not, like if he walked into a room and everyone went quiet he’d think it was because of him and he’s want to kill them. Or something to that extent. He said he battles his mind everyday not to do stupid things like that. If we get into an argument and I’m hearing the white noise it becomes unbearable. I’d say I need space about 100 times but he won’t listen then would get in my face saying hit me. I have before but it was impulse control. To make you understand search up “reactive abuse”. He’s manipulative too. Always making me feel like the bad guy. Mind you all of these episodes he shows in front of our children. Half of me wants OUT ASAP. And the other half wants me to help him. I’m generally scared after hearing what I heard last night. He also said if I keep doing what I’m doing he’s eventually in 5-10 years time going to hit me too..