Why Lash Out, O Tongue, Why?
Suffering from Bipolar Disorder is still a good life. I need contacts to see well and that hasn’t ruined my life. Unlike vision, however, it would rarely hurt my other half’s feelings if I were groping around our place unable to see clearly. Bipolar does, without corrective “lenses,” clear helpful inhibitions so I’m saying things so cruel the melt the paint off the walls a little. It’s like, “Why can’t I shut my mouth?”
So in lieu of physically sewing my lips together, I’m saying a word we have previously agreed on to signal my immediate departure to have a tantrum elsewhere. It may have saved a beak up for now. What’s the next fortification against a disease that needs stronger and stronger “lenses” all the time?
@csoldiersmarch hello march, it's great that you've identified a strategy to help step back from the automatic reaction of lashing out at others. You've asked about what to do to ward off future escalation; I'm not sure what other techniques you've tried so far, but - parallel to the urge-surfing used in addiction management - the same method can be deployed here via surfing the anger wave: learning to recognise your triggers, and working to respond rather than react. I've linked to an article that goes into more detail about this.
@csoldiersmarch
Wow. I love your thought process. How you've found ways to understand your condition. How you accept your condition but remain determined that life is still worth living. This attitude is an inspiration.
I'm also impressed how you have identified a problem (saying things that hurt) and found a simple effective way to manage it. That sounds like a technique that has a lot of promise to work. Are you one of those people who can just decide to change and from that point on, you do it? If so, I'm very jealous. If I decide to change, it takes me so many repetitions to switch that it's hard to stay motivated sometimes.
Anyway, thank you for sharing. I'm really pleased to hear what you are up to.
