New Grad Nurse
I’m a new grad nurse, and have been working since end of October on a medsurge cardiac and neuro unit. I feel so awful all the time, my anxiety has been so bad since starting and I’ve had to increase my medication multiple times, I feel like my depression has just gotten so much worse. The nausea from being anxious is so bad I can barely eat, most nights I get no sleep because I’m constantly having nightmares about what I might have forgotten or am doing wrong, or will do wrong. I still feel like I have no idea what I’m doing and it’s not getting any better. I start 6 patients this week and couldn’t even keep up with 5 before and get all my charting done on time (that’s without even doing all the communicating with the providers on my own). I feel like I made the wrong choice even thought this is all I had wanted my whole life and cry myself to sleep every night, and cry after almost every shift. I have to stay on this unit for at least 2 years and I don’t know how I’m going to make it, I feel like I’m trapped and can’t escape. I’m so terrified of patients coding or needing rapid response teams and that I won’t know enough about them or be able to do enough for them. I’m so terrified of making a mistake and hurting someone yet I know I’m going to make a mistake because everyone does. Everyone keeps just telling me I’ll get it eventually and I’m really hoping I do but I really don’t feel like I will. Theses feeling just keep increasing and I feel like I’m so overwhelmed by them that they’re consuming me. I just don’t know what to do, I’m working with my insurance to find a therapist I can talk to and I think I’m already at the highest dose of my current medication I can be on (I’ve tried so many at this point). I just don’t know what else to do.
@Evineen New jobs are always stressful no matter what profession you’ve in. But I think I would be just as freaked out if I was working in a job like yours. I doubt I would have finished school in that profession because it would terrify me being potentially responsible for someone’s life or health. But you don’t have to take on all of this responsibility. The profession itself has set these conditions. It’s less than ideal and unfair to practitioners and patients alike. But you will absolutely get better at this. I hope you can connect with a therapist soon to get the much needed support. You deserve to be supported while you navigate this. In the end your health is the most important - and you can best take care of yourself by taking a breath and having faith in yourself and the people around you who are suggesting you trust that things will get better. I hope what I’ve said helps and just want you to know I think you are a bit of a hero for choosing this profession. If it turns out you decide this profession is not for you then I still think you’re a hero.
@Evineen
Nursing is a tough career and has so much responsibility to it. So first, let me say thank you for taking on this role and being there for those who are needing someone to care for them.
My next thought is that if you were making big mistakes or they thought you were a liability, they would have already let you go or moved you to a less intensive unit.
I hear your stress and anxiety. I imagine I would feel that way as well. This is your career and people's lives are in your hands! You feel overwhelmed. You are no longer a student and this is for real.
Let me ask you a question. What made you decide that this is what you wanted to do as a life career? What about nursing made you choose to do this?
When you're on shift and you feel like things are getting really stressful, are you able to just stop for a brief moment and take a deep breath in and slowly blow it out and think, I graduated, and I can do this? I am a nurse, I am capable - I am qualified. If you haven't done this, what do you think would happen if you tried something like this in the midst of the anxiety?
This isn't to minimize your anxiety, but to help you slow the anxiety a bit, and to remind you that you were good enough to graduate, and if you did well enough to graduate, you are good enough to do this as a career.
Hello @Evineen
Good for you in graduating from nursing school!
Although I'm not a nurse myself, but I work with nurses in Operating Room, and we often have students (or new nursing staff who are wanting to work in the Operating Room). Some are fresh grads, while others have worked in different departments as nurses. So, I have seen the stress that these students have experienced.
It's only been a little over a month since you've started officially working as a nurse. A lot of the times, it's being more confident in yourself. Believe in yourself. You've graduated, which means you have the qualifications of being a nurse. As for skills, the more you do something repeatedly, the more easy it becomes. Give yourself the right to learn, to make mistakes. What others tell you is right, these feelings will eventually go away. As soon as you're more confident in yourself, the anxiety will begin to lessen. Depending on the pace, you may or may not be able to stop and do something to calm your anxiousness at the time it hits you. Are you able to speak with some senior nurses? If there are one or two nurses whom you feel can give you good guidance, maybe ask them for their opinion. How did they deal with the stresses when they first became a nurse? Or you could even ask them for feedback on your work. When you have someone telling you what you're doing is right, that you didn't make any mistakes, that will help you build the confidence.
You've came this far already, finishing nursing school is not easy. Applaud yourself for that. Give yourself time to adjust, to build the skills, to gain the confidence. Then, the anxiety should slowly lessen and go away. You can do this! 💖
Hi, OP. I have the same problem, I am also fresh graduate, working on healthcare. I'm glad I found this post and thought I was the only one suffering because of the mistakes I have made/ could make. This already been overdue but How are you?