A Special Check-In Thread
Hey. How's everyone? Bad? Good? Numb? It's ok. Your feelings are valid. Your experiences are valid. I know things may be hard now but I know you'll find a way out soon. I know you're stronger than your depression.
So..... How's life? Well it's ok if you don't wanna talk about it. I will be here besides you if you would love to tell more. If you ask me what is the point of telling us your stories, well you know, I don't have any answers for that unfortunately. But I want you to know that, whatever it is, at least for me, it's worth to be listened to. Even if you think it'll never make you any better, I feel lucky to be here with you through all this thing. Maybe I couldn't make things any better for you but I hope this small gestures of mine could help it better even if it's just a small bit.
It's ok to cry. It's ok to grief. It's ok to be vulnerable. You have gone through so much. I'm sorry that I couldn't take away any of your pain. I'm sorry I couldn't do nothing much about it. I want you to know, even if you're at your worst right now, you're not weak. I'm amazed by how far you've survived all the odds in your life. I know you don't deserve any of this pain and suffering.
"How can you be so confident and optimistic about this? You don't even understand or know what I've been through," Well I don't know. I don't even know how I can be optimistic and confident about all of these. I just thought that I'm an expert about faking everything. I just say that because I would love for someone to say those things to me during my times. I want to spread some senses of hope and positivity even though it always turned to be false but I still hope for the best. I may not understand everything in your life but I am curious what you've gone through and I want to support you with best support I could provide.
"But other people have it worse than I am. I deserve all of these" I hear you. I want to know that even if it's just a tiny or small petty problems it still matters and valid. Differences in our depressions and experiences doesn't make our worth and our presence in here less important. You matter, important and precious just like everyone else. If you think you deserve all of these, do you think straying animals which get treated poorly, deserve all the pain and suffering they got from this world? I'll leave it to your thoughts about that.
"Why do you even care about me?" Well I'm sorry, It's my fault for being stubborn for loving and caring other people more than I love and care about myself. Maybe it's because I don't want others to go through what I've been through and for sure I just want to spread some loves for you. Although it's temporary, you still deserve loves, appreciation and care.
There are so many beautiful things that awaits you. Maybe you feel hopeless and helpless now but I'll continue to spread helps and hopes as much as I could. If you feel like giving up, Please take rests for a while and take care of yourself at the moment. You deserve kindness from yourself too. Slow down and let's take a breather outside for a while. Small steps are fine and I know you can do it. Please reach out to crisis hotlines or crisis resources if you feel like you need it.
This depression doesn't make you any weaker. You've outgrown your past self and you're stronger now. We care about you. You can overcome this. Go at your own pace. Slow and steady wins the race. Thanks for reading :) I hope your days will turn out to be better after this.
@kdsyahirah
Today, I feel a little more drained because
1. I talked with my counselor and wrote two entries in my journal about accepting that a former friend is a jerk and why she is no good for me. Believe me, it was a very traumatic experience too and took a toll on my emotions.
2. The weather is very rainy and dark which will be for a few days.
However, I am managing to keep my emotions in check by
1. Going to an energy worker who is treating the depression
2. I am exercising three days a week and using a pool at a rec center
3. I am working on eating better, buying healthy foods, and cooking it to save money
4. I am also taking supplements that my doctor suggested
You are doing really awesome things. You should be very proud of how hard you are fighting. @Summershy
@kdsyahirah hello dear, thank you for that amazing post. It actually is like you opened the heart to us and I felt so much love from that @@ I am so thankful for your caring and being here! I am actually a bit stressed and nervous today, but I guess I must manage that. Thank you once again for that post!
@inventiveAcai3503 Aww it's nothing much to be honest ❤️ For me, it's the smallest thing I could do for everyone in here. It's ok one step at a time. I know you can manage it 😊
Hi!
Your post is wonderfull, thank you for that. It made me cry a little (but I am such a cry baby these days that there's no wonder... I was numb for so long that even this crying is a step forward, kinda...)💚
I'm on the strange place mentally these days. I've had some health issues that i neglected and i continued to overworked myself to the point I collapsed one morning before going to work. The funny part is I was so convinced I'm just gonna work after I woke up... Also I was so scared to tell my SO what happened... (Ok, clearly this isn't very funny...) But I've got myself to the medical check instead and so now I'm on my sick leave for the first time in my life.
I don't hate it, i sleep a lot, eat sometimes too, cry a lot.
I'm just horribly tired sometimes, I wish I could just pack my backpack and move somewhere without telling anyone a single word. I would live somewhere in the woods, in solitude and peace of mind... (In reality i don't think it could work but it's a nice thought.) I'm a bit lost...
However, I'm doing better, I'm seeing my therapist once in a month now, not weekly like before, and I am trying my best to keep it up, I go out more often, I even start reading books again...
I'm lost in my thoughts a little today, so I guess I'm gonna stop here (it's confusing enough now, lol).
Anyway, thank you for your kind words.
And I hope everyone around here is doing good!☘
So great to hear from you.
It is so nice that you are getting a medical break and are feeling well enough mentally to move to monthly therapy check-ins. Crying is just fine. I don't see it as a good or bad thing. Sometimes you need it and sometimes you don't.
I would love to escape sometimes too. The way I get through it is try to plan mini-outings at least once a month and a good vacation once a year. If I can focus on those moments then the rest seems easier. @versatilePear4061
Thank you, @bestVase ☘
You're right.
About the escape, i think it's just the idea that I won't have much free time until the end of the year... That scares me a lot. But i'll manage I guess.
Take care💚
I don't have much free time either. I am caring for my sick mother which takes up every weekend. I spend most time exhausted. But I am determined to find a window, a mini-window, each month. On Monday we will spend the morning at a botanical garden. That is all we will get for October. But it will be enough. I will make it so. @versatilePear4061
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, you must be very strong to do so💚
And it sounds nice, i just suck at planning anything for various reasons (exhausted all the time, drained, not seeing point in anything, sometimes all together). But i guess I'll try anyway. Thank you @bestVase7265 ☘
@kdsyahirah thanks for taking the time to write this, so thoughtful and generous of you to do so 🤍🙏🏼☺️ Showing this amount of support and love goes a long way and it’s the simplest things like these that really make a difference and brings people who’ve been through any sort of pain together 🙏🏼
not feeling the best, feel like its really hard
I am sorry. Did you want to tell us more?@dreamRainbows3245
